Darlene's Journal Posts

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0><tr> <td valign="top" colspan=2 height=65 BGCOLOR="#666699" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="04e00840erlcjm.png"> <div> <FONT SIZE="4" COLOR="#FFFFFF" FACE="Arial" ><B>Darlene's Journal Posts</B></FONT><B>     |     </B><A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Mark Felling.com Dont let life pass you"><B>home</B></A></div> <div> back to<B>  </B><A HREF="caringbridge.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Caring Bridge Archive"><B>Caring Bridge Archive</B></A></div> <div> </div> </td> </tr><tr> <td valign="top" width=150 BGCOLOR="#CCCCFF" TEXT="#080000" background="04811c00egdysm.png"> <bR> <div> <B>Darlene's Journal Posts</B></div> <div> <A HREF="id422.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Guestbook Responses">Guestbook Responses</A></div> <div> <A HREF="id467.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Amy Mareck The Fight">Amy Mareck "The Fight"</A></div> <div> <B>------------------------------</B></div> <div> <A HREF="blog.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Blog Musings"><B>Mark's New Blog (Journal</B></A><B>)</B></div> <div> <A HREF="guestbook.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Guestbook"><B>New Guestbook</B></A></div> </td> <td valign="top" height=415 width="100%" BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="5" CELLSPACING="1" WIDTH="816" BORDERCOLORLIGHT="#C0C0C0" BORDERCOLORDARK="#808080" FRAME="BOX" RULES="ALL" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" > <tR> <tD VALIGN=CENTER HEIGHT= 82 ><NOBR><div> <A HREF="http://www.broadenedhorizons.com" TARGET="_blank" TITLE="http://www.broadenedhorizons.com"><B><IMG SRC="961dd4b0.png" border=0 width="221" height="75" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></A></div> </NOBR></tD> <tD VALIGN=CENTER WIDTH="94"><div> <A HREF="http://www.BroadenedHorizons.com" TARGET="_blank" TITLE="http://www.BroadenedHorizons.com"><B>"Innovative Solutions for the Mobility Impaired"</B></A></div> </tD> <tD VALIGN=CENTER WIDTH="467"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="82" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="467" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></tD> </tR> </TABLE></div> <div> <B>Friday, May 7, 2004 12:09 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> Wow! I was surprised that it has been two weeks already since I last wrote. I will try to catch up as best as my memory serves me. </div> <div> Mostly it is house news. I have been working like a dog trying to get his current home fixed up nicely to put on the market. We are not doing anything out of the ordinary but when a person owns a home, it is an ongoing process of cleaning, fixing and updating. It needed a very thorough cleaning and completing unfinished projects plus the normal spring work. Last week I think I was down several days. I know one time was late Wednesday afternoon after work, my sister Eileen, went with me and we hauled all the items and junk he no longer wanted or needs to the curbside for city-wide pick-up on Sat. Scavengers were cruising the streets lookiing for treasures so some items disappeared about as quickly as we placed them out there. We worked on a few other things to until we were very tired. Got home very late again. By weeks end I was exhausted to the point of being depressed and extremely tired. So I slept and hour or two each afternoon, stayed home the weekend, and by Monday I felt like a normal person again. Priya and Ben participated in the spring musical at school (which was Oklahoma) so I went to several performances of that. It was very enjoyable and the kids all did a fantastic job. </div> <bR> <div> I left for the cities on Tueday afternoon, suitcase in tow, so I could stay overnight and not be spending so much time on the road. I picked Mark up and we were there the remainder of Tuesday evening. I got to Dee and Jeff's about midnight left early Wed. morning to work on the house. Mark did not come but Eileen drove down and we finished packing up his room. She left for to go to work and I was there while professionals came to shampoo the carpets that remain. Mark tore up several after he bought the house and refinished the beautiful hardwood floors that are in the house. He never did get to doing the bedrooms. I only worked till about 8 Wed. night and then decided to stay over another night. Mark came yesterday with metro mobility and spent most of the day there. He had two people hired to help so a few more jobs got checked off. One of them power-washed the siding. Sure makes a difference so now I would like to do ours!!! I am sure ours is probably worse yet from all the dust from the gravel road. There a few things Mark would like to have done yet but I hope I will be able to say "no" because I am physically and emotionally exhausted. Yesterday was not one of my better days so by the time I got home, I had to have an extra glass of salt water to replace what I had lost!!!! I have to say though that the house is looking pretty darn nice but I guess it should since many hands have worked hard on it. </div> <div> As for the new home that we put a purchase agreement on about a month ago, it is now ours or Mark's. We are not certain yet if we will be the owners or if Mark will but either way, closing date is set for the 28th of May. Then we can start all over again on the house. It is only 10 or 11 years old but the inside needs to be painted and some work done too. The man that built it and still lives there was/is in a wheelchair as well. He, too, is a quad though a lower vertebrate than Mark so he has partial use of his fingers and hands and complete use of his wrists and arms. He also has torso muscle control so his balance is considerably better too. But anyway, the home is completely accessible and wheelchair friendly. It is out in Maple Grove off Weaver Lake Road. Earl and I are hoping it will work for him. We have a number of concerns, one of them the inevitablity of him being alone at times. But knowing Mark, he will eventually conquer all the challenges that he will meet up with. He is anticipating some tough times but I think he is tougher--at least I hope! Earl has been putting in some very long days too trying to get the crops all planted. The down side there is that it is so very dry so hopefully everyone will be blessed with rain real soon.</div> <bR> <div> I think that is about it for now. Thanks once again to all of you for your support and prayers. I say it all the time but I have to say again, we couldn't do it alone. Many days God has given us strength when we thought we were depleted. Thanks again and have a great weekend. </div> <bR> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, April 23, 2004 8:10 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> I have been wanting to write since Monday but have not had a chance. I have a million things that really need to be done so I thought I better do this as one of the first or it won't happen again! </div> <bR> <div> Easter week progressed normally and there wasn't any news on the home we have a purchase agreement on. As far as that goes, we aren't sure what to think because as of last night, we still have NOT heard. It really is getting to the point where I feel like calling the owner's realtor myself to see what is going on. When we were told two plus weeks ago that the home was "ours" that was the homeowner accepting our offer but apparently his lender has final/more say than he does. I guess it is one more way that the Lord is saying He is in control and we are dependent on His wishes. All in due time :-)</div> <bR> <div> Earl had 6 tickets for a 2:00 show at the Ordway last Sunday so we picked Mark up and were off to St. Paul to see "Hot and Cole". It was a tribute to Cole Porter's music. Ben was unable to go along but Priya could and Jim and Jenny came over to meet us and go along so it was nice. It would have been nice if we could have gone out to eat afterwards but we had to be home for chores. Even though most of us were not very familiar with most of Porters work, it was a very enjoyable show and afternoon. After we brought Mark back to the Courage Center and started home, we noticed the skies getting progressively darker. A few miles before Monticello, we ran into a terrible hailstorm. Everyone was pulled to the shoulders because it was impossible to see for a time. We thought for sure that the van would have quite a bit of damage but fortunately it looks fine. Neither Earl or I had never experienced anything quite like it. Just before we drove into it, the outside temperature shown in our van was like 90 degrees. In the storm, it dropped to 46!!! Then by the time we got to Clearwater it was back to about 63 or so. It only lasted for about a 2 mile stretch but was wicked. I tried to drive forward every time I could see just a bit in hopes we would get out of it with minimal damage. </div> <bR> <div> Tuesday my mom, sister Eileen and I went to Mark's current house again. We did mostly painting and a little cleaning. We worked really hard and both Eileen and myself were in a lot of pain (mostly from exhaustion I think) by the time we left shortly after midnight. The "oh, lets just do this too yet" got us into trouble and home way too late. This coming Sunday I am planning to go once again; I want to paint the garage door yet and if Earl goes along, he will put some baseboard back that Mark had not gotten back into place after he redid the wood floors. It really looks nice with all the fresh, new paint and all the work Mark had put into it...... guess I won't go there.</div> <bR> <div> This weekend too, is the prom so Ben will be attending that on Saturday. It is always fun to see everyone so dressed up, looking their best and a little sad realizing they are nearly adults and soon to be gone from home. I guess that is about all for this session. Since I plan to be home all day today and if I am going to move mountains, I better get shakin'. Hopefully, I can write next week and say we are able to purchase the accessible home but for now we'll just pray all goes well. Thanks again for your diligence in praying for Mark's courage and strength to find his way. It is not without huge appreciation on the part of everyone in our family. Love, Darlene </div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, April 12, 2004 1:20 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Happy Easter everyone,</div> <div> I know it was yesterday but the Easter season continues on until Ascension Thursday so I can still wish you that. I really do hope everyone had a nice, relaxing Easter Sunday and with family if possible. Earl, Ben, Jim, Priya and myself were at Earl's brother and sister-in-law--Cyril and Debbie for Easter. Most of the family were there but some of the nieces and nephews were unable to come. Greg had to stay in Winona on RA duty at WSU and Mark--well, that is a longer story :-)</div> <bR> <div> That story begins on Saturday. Mark planned a spring work day at his house asking several people for help. The last note in his requesting email was he would provide beverages for all in attendance-pop, beer and wine. Guess what, I'm still thirsting for a glass of wine!! Earl, Priya and I went from here (with a huge casserole in tow) leaving Ben behind in charge of the farm and cows. I left Earl off at the Courage Center to pick Mark up and off to his house we were. We got there about 12:30 or 1:00 and my sisters Jeanne (and her sons Jon and Joel)and Eileen were already there along with my parents. Some of us started by raking the front lawn and got that raked and picked up in short order. We "girls" started painting soon after Mark and Earl got there. Jon, Joey, Earl and Priya worked in the back yard. Jon toughed it out finishing by himself, trimmed shrubs and the whole nine yards! Jeff, Mark's uncle, and daugher Emily came later int he afternoon. He and Earl worked on some carpentry type things and were going to finish opening the pool that Scott started a few days b/4 but that didn't quite happen. Time sure flies when you're having fun!! Eileen gave the bathroom two coats of paint and I worked on the dining room. One of Mark's friends, Shelly, stopped by after her sister's bridal shower and helped me. About 9 or 10 that night we decided we would paint the kitchen as well so everything would sort of "flow" together. Mark had painted all these rooms after he bought the house but they were bolder colors and the realtor suggested painting with more mellow colors. We got all of it finished except for the section between the upper and lower cupboards. I will either finish it one day this week or one of his roommates indicated she might finish it too. That is fine with me. Jeanne and Grandma worked with Mark's direction packing up and emptying the entertainment center and some things in his bedroom. They discarded a lot and packed a lot. Jeff also got the sunroom or 3-season porch emptied of some stuff and cleaned a bit. </div> <bR> <div> All in all, I think we did pretty darn good. All of us, but I think Mark esp. had hoped for more completed projects. But we are all old enough toknow things always take longer than planned or wished for. We left his house very late and we both decided it would be best if he would sleep at the Courage Center and come with Jim on Sunday morning. We left there about 2:00 am and got home at 3:35!! Earl slept a little over an hour and was up and running again to make it in time for Easter Sunday Mass. We are still tired today! Mark, too, was extremely tired and decided not to come with Jim. He has really been having trouble with his neck being extremely painful by the end of the day and that day was super long. He felt sad not having been with everyone yesterday but was comfortable being there too. Dee and Jeff were going to take him to their home but I haven't talked to him to see if he went. As far as the other home goes that we are trying to buy, well we should hear by tommorow if our offer is accepted. But we'll see if that happens because we were told last Tuesday that it was "ours" and found out later in the week that it was incorrect information. So we'll see what turns this week will bring. That is about it for now. Oh, did anyone see the extreme home makeover last night on ABC? They redid a home for a family whose son is a quad also? It sure hit home for me. Thanks, Jill K., for letting me know that it was going to be on. I sure found it heartwarming and could totally understand how Robert and his family felt. Thanks to everyone for your support and help and a HUGE THANK YOU to all who helped Mark/us on Saturday. Actually it was a lot of fun too. How fortunate we are to be surrounded by angels--workers and pray-ers :-) Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, April 5, 2004 9:17 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning everyone,</div> <div> I am really getting old and slow (or something!). I have been sooo busy the last 2 or 3 weeks so I just have not had a chance to write. I have asked Mark to do it, but he says he doesn't know what to write. Imagine that from a person that is seldom at a lack for words! </div> <bR> <div> I will try and back track a bit. Mark did come home here a few weeks ago (as talked about in the previous entry) with Jim and it was great having him/them here. They left again Sat. night. The following weekend I went on a Castaways youth retreat with Ben as a leader so that left Earl and Priya to hold down the fort so they were not able to visit Mark either. Fortunately Jim took some time to visit him and they went to Mark's house and did a few jobs so I was glad that he had some family there. He looks forward to visitors and lately he feels like he is being forgotten yet he knows how busy everyone is because he was there once. Sunday (the 28th) Earl and I went to see him but had to be back for chores so it was a relatively short day. We picked him up in the morning and went to Mass at the Bascilica in Mpls. and then to his house. Earl worked on some things and Mark and I went to Menards to get the things he needed. Priya and Ben had been to Winona for "Siblings weekend" and fortunately got home about chores time so they started because of course we got home later than planned. Big surprise, uh? Mark had been hoping to do some shopping for clothes and a clog-type shoe. He has a pretty good sore going on the back of his foot either from the shoes he was wearing or from the bed. So anyway I went down again last Thursday to do some shopping and to meet some potential buyers for his motorcycle down at his house. That was short because the first guy bought it. Next is his Ford Explorer on the list to sell and then the house. We are hoping to put it one the market by May 1. We may have to take some of you up on your continuing offers for help. We also looked at an accessible home in Maple Grove that we really liked. </div> <bR> <div> I got home late again that night and Friday morning quickly did a few things and chores here at home and then Earl and I were off again for a "very mini" vacation. Jim thought Earl needed to get away for a bit b/4 all the spring work starts so we went to southern MN and saw the dealership that Jim manages; visited some long-time friends of ours; and then went to Greg's in Winona. We spent the night there and he was able to spend the rest of Friday and all of Sat. with us. He is certainly a busy young man! He gave us a special tour of the college and city including a drive to the top of the bluffs. What a beautiful view! Sat. night we drove back to Red Wing and stayed at the historical St. James Hotel. What a fun experience and spectacular place that is. It far surpasses any modern day hotel in style and character. Yesterday we made our way back to Golden Valley and picked Mark up and looked at some townhomes. They were just regular but not accessible. We did a second showing of the house in Maple Grove; the first time for Earl. I'll try to keep you posted if anything happens with that. </div> <bR> <div> That is one of the things Mark is working on--a place to live post Courage. He continues driving lessons which scare me to death with his limited movement but I guess theyknow what they are doing. I met two new quads last Thurs when I was there. One was just admitted that day and the other last Friday. "Jason" is a 20-yr. old C-5 just like Mark and was in a car accident and the other guy is about 40 and was hit by a drunk driver while he was walking on the sidewalk. He just had his halo off on Wed. Unfortunately these accidents just keep happening. </div> <bR> <div> I guess that is about all for now. Please continue to keep the prayers going. There are many, many people that need them. Have a great spring day and I will try to update sooner next time. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, March 12, 2004 9:15 AM CST </B></div> <div> Good morning on a bright, sunny, beautiful, chilly Friday! </div> <bR> <div> We were pleasantly surprised yesterday when Jim (Mark's brother) called to check if we were going to be home this weekend. He thought he would bring Mark along home with him when he comes. Since we are nearly always here, we immediately agreed that it would be a fantastic idea. We are excited to have both of them come home and since Mark has not been home since Christmas, it will be particularly special. Unfortunately (or luckily if your Ben!) Ben left this morning with the Drama Club for an overnight stay at the Hampton Inn in Sioux City, IA and they will be seeing the Titanic production at Lamb Productions Dinner Theater tonight and tommorow they will visit the Lewis and Cloark Center b/4 treking back home, so he won't be home but that is OK. I'm sure he will/is have a great time there and Mark probably won't care too much. Greg can't be here either since he is on the island of St. Croix in the Virgin Islands for spring break doing some mission work and playing! Kinda seems like Earl and I are the only ones here!!! On the selfish side, it will be nice to have Mark come here too, instead of us driving to the city.</div> <bR> <div> He has moved to another room again. Jerry, his roommate will be leaving on the 26th so he had put in his request for a private room when or if one would be available. He was told that it would be some time and they like to keep those for special medical situations. Something changed apparently and he moved already last weekend. He felt sad about leaving Jerry b/4 Jerry left Courage but decided to move. It works well for him to be alone since other voices or noises tend to mess up the voice recognition on his computer on whatever he happens to be working on at any given time. The down side is he will have to move again if they have a particular medical need come up. His new room phone number is still very similar except for the last two digits. It is 763-520-0765. His cell phone # is the same as it has been for a number of years but there is virtually no reception inside the building of Courage Center. </div> <bR> <div> His therapy has become very limited. They have a new gym area that he can do pulleys in but he needs someone to set him up. It is a very simple thing to do but the aids like to say that it is "not their job" so unless any of us as his visitors help him or a volunteer helps, he doesn't get the exercise. So I will ask any one of you who visits, insist that he do pulleys so he maintains and builds more strength. He'd rather do other things with visitors, but a short time spent exercising can pay off. Once he/we can figure out a workable living situation, he can leave and just return for therapy as an outpatient. But there are a number of challenges that need to be worked out before that happens. </div> <bR> <div> Last weekend, I went to visit him on Sunday. Mark has been wanting to visit a former patient, Jim Gores, and see the accessible home his wife built last summer while he was at Courage. He lives near Hampton and New Trier which are south of Hastings and east of Red Wing. Some of you may recall seeing Jim's story on Kare 11 last fall. It was a moving story about him and how his neighbors and community came together to not only put in and harvest his crop but to help build this home as well. A year ago Jan. 4, Jim was in the woods doing his favorite activity of cutting wood. He hit a log with his 4 wheeler and fell off the back breaking his neck. His core body temp. was so low that the Drs. said within 1/2 hour he would have died. He is a C-5 quad like Mark but has the use of his wrists back. He and his wife were very encouraging not to give up hope yet! We had a really nice visit with them and enjoyed seeing their beautiful home with some good ideas that work well with an electric chair. Sadly, Jim has been sick a lot with urinary tract and bladder infections, both of which are very common in people experiencing paralysis. By the time we left, he felt he was coming down with another bout and he was experiencing a fever. So hopefully his Dr. can figure something out so that will get better. </div> <bR> <div> On our way back to the Courage Center, we stopped for dinner/supper (depending on what you may call it) at a place called Kahn's Mongolian Barbecue. I had never been there before so that was fun for me. Mark had not been there either b/4 but when he was in Russia and Siberia in 2002, they had places that cooked in a similar style. You go through a buffet line and choose the raw meats, vegetables, and sauces that you desire. Then you move onto the cooking area where a chef stir-frys your choices on a large (3-4 ft. diameter), extremely hot, griddle like table. Within a couple of minutes your meal is ready and very delicious. Both Mark and I enjoy Chinese syle food very much and this was somewhat similar so it was great fun. I stayed overnight at Dee and Jeff's Sunday night since it was quite late again by the time I left Mark. It gets to be a long drive home alone. Plus what is better than waking up to an active 2-yr. old nephew??!! Jack really is cute......Unfortunately, I got into the midst of the short snowstorm that left the metro roads extremely icy and many accidents in its wake. Fortunately, I was fine. </div> <bR> <div> I think that about covers things for another time. We do feel so blessed to have the support and prayers of all of you and thank you from the depths of our hearts for that. We appreciate your continued prayers for recovery, strength and whatever God feels he needs. Thanks again.</div> <div> Love, Darlene </div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, February 27, 2004 10:43 AM CST </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> I realized logging on that two weeks have slipped by already since I last wrote. Along with time slipping away, so is our snow supply. We have been enjoying much warmer temperatures lately and that certainly is welcomed by many Minnesotans. Our family enjoys downhill skiing as a winter sport and not snowmobiling so it doesn't bother us to have a mid-winter thaw. </div> <bR> <div> Backing up to Valentine's Day two weeks ago, Mark went out to eat with his friend and enjoyed that. Last Friday Mark ended up catching the stomach flu and had a couple of days where he felt queasy off and on. Earl and I went down last Sunday and we went over to his house with him. Greg also came up from Winona to meet all of us there so that was nice because we had not seen him since he went back to college after the Christmas break. We worked on some of the remodeling/updating projects he had started. Of course once you get into a job, it is difficult to stop (esp. for Earl!) so Earl and I did not get home until 1:30 a.m. It made for a long day on Monday :-) This week Earl and I went back to the metro area for the Land O' Lakes annual meeting. Wednesday evening was a free evening so we visited Mark after we ate at a nice restaurant with some friends. We are not sure yet how this coming weekend will play out. </div> <bR> <div> As for the rehab side of things, the weeks have remained constant up until this week. He has been pulled from physical therapy since they cannot justify to insurance that enough progress is being made. In the process of communication (or more the lack thereof!), he was pulled from all therapy!! So he spent Mon. & Tues. trying to straighten that out. He will continue in occupational therapy and supposedly more of it to work on further strenghtening of his arms and try to get some stability or balance back to his upper body. His attitude or emotional state is slightly improved from a little while ago but facing the unknown is tough. No more progress has been made on a place to live when he leaves there. So that is the latest for now. I guess if I think of more, I will have to add it later. As always, thanks so much for your continuing thoughts and prayers. He really does need those prayers whether he knows it or not! May God bless all of you and him. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, February 14, 2004 9:47 AM CST </B></div> <div> Happy Valentine's Day!</div> <div> What a beautiful, sunny (cold) Valentine's morning we have. Yesterday was really warm--getting close to the 32 degree milestone but reality is back today. </div> <bR> <div> I will attempt to rewind back a couple of weeks with Mark. He continues in therapy as usual. I had planned to go visit him on Sunday, Feb. 1 but by the time I came out of Mass, the weather forecast was for the metro area to get about 3-4" of snow so Mark and I decided I should stay home. They ended up getting about from 8" to 12" of the white stuff so I was real glad I did stay home. So by last Sunday, I was getting pretty antsy to see him again. All of us here left after Mass (and a quick peek into the Carnival at school--well a 1/2 hour peek!) to visit him. After we got to the Courage Center, we took him with us to Dee & Jeff's (my sister & brother-in-law) home to celebrate their son's, Jack's, second birthday. He is, of course, the cutest two year old around!! Spoken like a true auntie! We enjoyed his party but Mark was a little less than enthusiastic. </div> <bR> <div> The last month has been very difficult for him. He seems to be feeling very frustrated, somewhat angry, depressed and just generally not the Mark most of us know. Not all his determination has vanished, but certainly is diminished. Some of the "I know what I'm talking about" Mark that we know is still there but just coming out in a different way. I can only imagine what it might be like to be in his shoes (just that can only be a fraction of what it must be like to actually facing the reality of what he is facing) and that in itself is too much for me to think of handling some days. Even Jerry, his roommate, has noticed a difference in his personality. I guess it is another normal step in the healing process. He has been checking into places to live after he leaves the Courage Center. He has just started working with a couple of realtors and looking at a few condos last Saturday. He found out "accessible" means ground floor, no stairs. One of the "accessible" ones he looked at had a 90degree turn off the hallway to get into the bedroom but the hallway was so narrow, he was unable to even make the turn! So that, too, is upseting to him. All of us know it will all work out in the end but until then.... Mark is so used to being in control and I believe that is a great source of his frustration. I know it would be for me. Being dependent on all of us and having to wait for help is not an easy thing. </div> <bR> <div> He did seem to have a little better week this week. Last Sunday when we were there he was in the "Permobil" brand chair. He liked it a lot but it is a little larger chair thus making it a little more challenging to maneuver in around places. It is built very well though. Then on Tuesday, I believe, the representative from "Levo" came and brought a chair for him to try just for the day. It had a stand-up feature on it. Looking back, it was a bit humorous but he had a mishap that wasn't so funny when it happened. He asked the Permobil rep when driving in the stand-up position if you can go down a "curb cut-out" or not? He had told him no, that really doesn't work. So of course he asked the Levo rep the same thing and he clearly remembers hearing, yes, that would work with that particular chair. so of course, Mark took it outside and put it to the test. Guess what?! He took a good fall and landed face down on the pavement in a slushy, wet, dirty, salty puddle from a strapped in, standing position. You know all those prayers you have been saying, well, I think a few that may have been in reserve got used that day! He came out of it with nothing more than some scratches on his pinkie finger!!! He didn't even break skin on his face or mouth! He nearly gave a few people a heart attack, esp., the aid that was with him. A few people had to grunt to get him up and then they changed his clothes and he was good to go again. All in all, so far that is his favorite chair but he will try it out for a longer time b/4 he makes a purchase. He should be trying out another one either this coming week or the following one. </div> <bR> <div> I went down on Thursday of this week and we went to his house and spent a lot of time there cleaning up some of his tools and then inside we went through lots of his papers and boxed up books, etc. He felt better about things when we left. That has been weighing on his mind too. So I hope to do that again soon. His aunt, Eileen, came for a visit too, and ended up cleaning/vacuuming in the basement. Mark/we would like to rent out the large bedroom if possible. So if you know of someone, let us know. I think that covers the latest news again. I hope you have a great Valentine's Day and weekend as well as the week ahead. We still appreciate your prayers and support as much as ever and probably still need them and it as much as ever. Maybe more, who knows?! Thanks so very much.</div> <div> Love, Darlene </div> <bR> <div> <B>Sunday, January 25, 2004 4:41 PM CST </B></div> <div> Hello everyone,</div> <div> I hope everyone is enjoying this Sunday afternoon and catching up on some R&R (like we did) or doing something enjoyable to refresh for the upcoming work week. I thought I would update you on Mark and what he has been up to over the last week since I last wrote. </div> <bR> <div> His week went pretty normal. He has been trying to get in touch with various wheel chair reps and has found that he has had to go over the local distributors in order to get any action. In one case, the actual salesman hadn't even been told that Mark was interested in trying out that particular company's chair even though Mark had called a number of times and talked to people that said they would notify him. So there are roadblocks there too, just as we experience lackadasical attitudes by so many people today. So hopefully by the end of February he will have been able to test drive three different brands of chairs that he has not tried out yet. </div> <bR> <div> We had been talking here at home that we wanted to take him to the Ice Castle in St. Paul sometime. It seemed that possibly the best time was for this weekend and yesterday was the best choice of the two days so we planned for that and it worked for him too. Unfortunately, he called about 7:00 a.m. yesterday and said he was not feeling well, hadn't slept well, and had been experiencing the chills and sweating intermittently. It was evident he was coming down with his second urinary tract infection (UTI). He was thinking at that point he would not feel good enough to see the Castle but we decided to go down anyway since Earl had someone to do chores. We thought he needed a good visit if he wasn't feeling well and we would go to the castle ourselves and I could just go back another evening and take him. Earl also wanted to do some maintainance things on the van that is down there. By the time we got there, his fever was down to normal from 101.8 and he was feeling pretty good again. So after his therapy, he decided he would go with us. We gave Dee & Jeff a call and tried to meet up at the Castle but they got there later than we did so all of us went out for supper together at a Ciatti's over in St. Paul. The Ice Castle was very cool (oops, I guess that is literally and figuritively!). It is much more impressive in person than what is shown on TV which is no surprise I guess. The light show, along with the music/sound effects is pretty neat. Other than being very darn cold and too many people (which we expected for the first weekend) it was great. For those that live in a warmer part of our wonderful world (bless them!) the Ice Castle is a castle built out of large ice blocks that have been cut out of one of our 10,000 Minnesota lakes and hauled in. It is pretty awesome. </div> <bR> <div> I always enjoy seeing Mark out and about doing what the rest of the world is doing and am so grateful when he "takes off", gets ahead of us, turns around at his destination and looks back to see if we are coming! I love for him to have that sense of being in control of at least some things. Anyway, by the time we were done eating (11:00 p.m.), he wasn't feeling so good again. But when we called him this morning, he was OK. They still hadn't started antibiotics but hopefully by the time we call him tonight, some Dr. or nurse willhave taken the initative to get things rolling. Nothing happens too fast around there. </div> <bR> <div> Speaking of tonight, we have honor of seeing yet another one of our sons in a tuxedo :-) (and it isn't a Prom, Greg!) Sno Daze events will be kicked off tonight at school with a coronation of a king and queen from the senior class that have been voted on over the last few weeks. Ben is the junior class male attendant/representative so basically he just has to show up in a tux, and escort the young lady that is representing the other half of the junior class. Mark would have loved to have come home for it but thought he better stay there as long as he is not up to 100 percent healthwise. Jim is in AZ for a work convention (tough place to be, huh?) and it is really too far for Greg to drive back since he had to work the rest of the weekend. So we'll take lots of photos for everyone to see later. Then there will be various events for the royalty to participate in the rest of the week. </div> <bR> <div> I also wanted to tell you that I met another young man's (Dave is now 29) mother yesterday in the Courage Center laundry room! Dave fell 30 feet off a stairs at a concert in Milwaukee, WI back in August of 2002. He has been at Courage since last January 8. He, too, had been a very active, successful young man and is now a quad. His spinal cord was 75 percent severed at the C4 vertebrate. He has use only of his shoulders, cannot move his arms at all. He is not on a ventilator though and moves his wheelchair with his head. It was yet another reminder for me that it could always be worse. I know I had met Dave or David as his mother called him, but didn't know his story or much about him. It was comforting to talk to her and have someone say I know exactly what you mean and know they do. She and her husband seem to be very nice people. She offered some optimism and that was good since I have been running low on that lately. </div> <bR> <div> That is about it for now. Oh, if any of you are planning to go to the Ice Castle over the next few weeks, one tip we could give you would be to get your tickets before you get to the site at any Twin Cities area Cub foods or SuperAmerica station. If you would go during the week, it wouldn't be nearly as crowded so that would be a plus too. But for most, that is not a good option. If you end up standing in line to purchase a ticket, it could make for a long, cold wait. Last night the line for a good part of the night was a TWO hour wait so if you make that stop first, you can go right in! I jumped around here some in my thought process but got it all down anyway. Continue to pray not only for Mark but for so many others that need our prayers--at the Courage Center, battling cancer (esp. Amy), battling in Iraq, etc. Thank you so much for your prayers and support. It is not unappreciated. </div> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, January 17, 2004 11:12 AM CST </B></div> <div> Hello everyone,</div> <div> It sure has been a long time since I have written here. I have been very busy and I guess there isn't a lot to write about. The old saying of "no news is good news" does not necessarily apply this time. Mark has not had any additional or significant changes regarding any new return of function, movement or sensory feeling. It has been depressing for him as well as our entire family. Since it is now past 6 months since his injury, the chances lessen with each passing day. I know we are not to give up hope and I certainly have not because I have heard of cases where significant changes have taken place in the first year or two. None the less, it has been disheartening especially those first weeks following Christmas. It seems to be better as we get back into the normal day to day living and routines again. He continues on in therapy as he has been doing for the last months at the Courage Center. </div> <bR> <div> As for his/our Christmas, he came home here in Albany Christmas morning and we had our family Christmas celebration that day; on Friday we had another celebration with my parents and sisters and then on Sunday, the 28th we were at Earl's brother's home for the Felling family Christmas. Ben and I took Mark back to the Courage Center that night. He really did enjoy all the celebrations in spite of them being a little bittersweet and having been reminded once again of the many limitations he is facing. It is always comforting to be surrounded by family and his cousins really are great and non-judmental with him. </div> <bR> <div> Duane Pung is no longer a resident at the Courage Center but continues to be there nearly daily for out-patient therapy. Duane is a fellow dairy farmer from Freeport (just a few miles from us) and was in a car accident on June 2 if you recall or I may not have mentioned b/4. He spends part of the week at home and part with his sister who lives near Golden Valley. Duane is a very spunky man and certainly added a lot to the spinal cord injury people that are residents there so he is missed in the evenings especially. We continue to pray for him and his family during this life-changing time. </div> <bR> <div> The only other thing that I can add or would ask is Mark needs/wants to sell his vehicle. Since modifying it or driving it again are not options, he needs to sell it. So if you are in need of or know someone who is in need of a very nice looking, well-kept 1995 Ford Explorer with the Eddie Bauer package, please give him or us a call. These things are all difficult to do but they need to be done. Later this spring, we will be getting his home ready to put on the market too, as it would be too costly to remodel to have it be accessible. That will be very difficult at least for me if no one else. Enough said. </div> <bR> <div> Thank you once again for you continued prayers and ongoing support. We still hear from so many people that prayers are still being said for him and for us. Many moments I draw on those for the strength needed to make it through that minute or that day. We are so grateful to be surrounded by such wonderful family and friends. Maybe that is why God allowed this to happen.....who knows why. </div> <div> Lots of love from me to all of you, </div> <div> Darlene </div> <bR> <div> <B>Wednesday, December 24, 2003 2:24 PM CST </B></div> <div> Merry Christmas, everyone!</div> <bR> <div> Hard to believe but Christmas is just hours away. I have a hard time figuring out how such a special and blessed time of year of can be so difficult at times but it is. I received quite a number of letters and cards from families that we met through Mark's accident and have a "unique" bond with them. Everyone seems to experience the same kinds of feelings and emotions. Fortunately our story is better than some families have this Christmas and we are sooo very grateful that Mark is with us and his mind is excellent. </div> <bR> <div> We are looking forward to him coming home for Christmas tommorow morning is now the plan. He is going to a friend's home this evening and then his friend will bring him home here tommorow and she will ride back with Jim then at night since they both have to work on Friday. Jim and Jenni will come home again Saturday morning to spend the weekend here and with the Felling side of the family on Sunday. My side of our family will get together on Friday and we have a wedding to go to on Saturday so it will be a full weekend. He will probably go back to Courage Sunday night or Monday for therapy. I hope it all goes well. As for New Year's I don't know what his plans are yet. </div> <bR> <div> He has had a short week for therapy but everything is about the same. He has researched, found, ordered, invented, and doing whatever to get a new cell phone working to the point where he can do it independently. I have not seen all the contraptions yet, but I'm sure we will in the next few days. He is quite the guy--I am very glad he has the abilities and determination to figure this technology thing out because he would be at the end of the line if he had to depend on me for that help!!!</div> <bR> <div> Most of all today, I want to wish each and everyone of you and your families a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS and all the blessings of the Christ Child so you can have the most fulfilling Christmas ever. May God bless all of you for your generousity, whether of time, laughter, tears, prayers, visits, cards, food, gifts, letters, phone calls, sharing whatever you had or have done for Mark or our family. Christmas is love and you are Christmas. Thank you, thank you, thank you.</div> <bR> <div> Forever grateful for your support,</div> <div> Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, December 15, 2003 10:21 PM CST </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> Another week is gone and another closer to Christmas! I surely hope I get to some shopping soon or it will be here. I did order a few gifts off the internet tonight so I'll just keep chipping away. </div> <bR> <div> Yesterday Ben and I went to visit Mark at the Courage Center and took him shopping and out to eat. We had a fun time and got most of his shopping done and enjoyed some Chinese food. Both Mark and I love Chinese cuisine. It was the most I had walked in the last ten days and I was exhausted and hurting by last night. So today I kind of laid low and thought I'd hit the mall running tommorow but now it looks like I might have to "slide" in. It is quite icy in much of Minnesota tonight so I may have to delay another day. </div> <bR> <div> Mark remains in good spirits with not really any changes happening. He is experiencing a lot of extreme muscle tightness in his neck that has been causing a lot of pain so much of his therapy time has been trying to ease that or fix it. Unfortunately his fingers are really tightening up too causing slight curling and they can no longer be totally straightened. His wrists as well are tight and cannot be stretched back to nearly 90 degrees as they would like to seem them do and stay flexible. The finger are OK with some curve so that if they do regain some movement, some curl can actually help or at least be Ok. But they like to see the wrists flexible so that it allows them to help in transfering himself should that become an option for him. To explain what I mean it is like if you and I sit on the floor and put our arms out a bit and behind ourself to hold ourself up into a sitting position and then we could slide our butt to another spot with the help of our arms. Does that help a little? :-)</div> <bR> <div> He and Jerry (his fairly new roommate) get along very well so that is nice. He and his wife are really nice people. Duane Pung from our area may be leaving (or left today) very soon. Insurance is putting a stop to his inpatient therapy and will only continue on an out-patient basis so the guys are really going to miss him. The group of spinal cord injury guys have really gotten close and have a good time together. He had quite a few visitors over the last two weeks so that was nice and everyone is bringing him Christmas goodies and treats. Tommorow night they are having a big resident Christmas party there and they have had a number of groups come through caroling, bringing good cheer and smiles. I think that is about it for now. </div> <bR> <div> Thanks for continuing to check in on him and many of you write him an email directly. I know he enjoys and appreciates that too. If you are wondering about his email address, you can use mark@felling.us or mfelling@yahoo.com One or the other or both should work just fine. Thanks so much for praying and all your support. Let's work on keeping Christ in Christmas! Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, December 8, 2003 8:37 AM CST </B></div> <div> Good morning everyone,</div> <div> The updating/sunny day thing doesn't seem to want to be working lately! I'll be so glad when these dreary days of late Nov. and December days are past and we see sun for a long stretch. I don't know how people manage in Alaska in the winter (or 24 hr. daylight in the summer for that matter!). </div> <bR> <div> News with Mark is pretty much the same things. Nothing new in the department of movement or sensation. He continues all types of therapies and is finally getting in the pool twice a week with a therapist :-) This started last week. Earl had to be in Mpls. on Wed. so he spent the latter part of the afternoon and evening with Mark. He had intentions of taking him out to eat but like life everywhere, it never goes as planned. There were two different wheelchair company reps there so Mark wanted to meet with them and get some questions answered and take advantage of the opportunity to test drive for a short time the Permobil chair that included the stand-up feature the rep had along. Switching chairs, getting ready to go to the pool, outside or pretty much anything is a very time-consuming process compared to how long it takes us able-bodied people to get changed or ready to go somewhere. So Earl and Mark stayed at Courage and ate supper together there and at least got to spend some time together. Oh before I forget, Mark is now in room 106B and his new phone number is only one digit different and is now 763-520-0786. Maybe I mentioned this in the last entry but he now has an answering machine hooked up so that should answer if he isn't there unless of course he is on the internet. The are still waiting for Quest or Sprint or whatever company to come and connect the entire Courage company/corporation to higher speed way of doing things. I imagine that will happen a week before or after Mark leaves :-) </div> <bR> <div> Over the last week, I spent a considerable amount of time in Doctor's offices or sleeping. I saw a reg. Dr. last Monday, a surgeon on Tuesday, home on Wednesday, hernia surgery on Thursday and recovering since that time. I spent most of Friday and Saturday sleeping. Yesterday I went to Mass and then slept! (in that order I might add!) Some of our friends were going to come but I slept instead and then in the afternoon some other friends called and wanted us to come for supper so we did do that. I do feel much better this morning with a lot less pain. I am not allowed to lift more than 15 pounds for two weeks and nothing heavy for six to eight weeks. So Mark's brothers and Earl will get their workout when Mark is home for Christmas. Speaking of Christmas, it sure is creeping up quickly. I hope I feel good enough to go to see Mark and get some shopping done later this week. I have a feeling lumps of coal won't cut it! </div> <bR> <div> I guess that is about all for now. Please continue to ask God to restore the use of Mark's wrists and fingers to him. I am getting worried that nothing is happening and it is five months. I spent a fair amount of time getting to know Mr. Kleenex again last night. It is so hard to believe this has happened to one of us or should ever happen to anyone. It is so life-changing and I don't like it. At this point, all we can do is pray to Him and ask for help. Also please keep Amy M., our senior in school here, has been fighting cancer for over four years. She is the sweetest, bestest, most vibrant girl you may ever meet and is determined to win and I believe she will but she keep running into roadblocks. So as you can see, she too, needs our prayers to win this fight once and for all. Thanks for all your help and support. Whether you know it or not, I can feel your support and what keeps us going.</div> <bR> <div> With love and appreciation, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Sunday, November 30, 2003 7:00 PM CST </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> I suppose I will get a lot of static (as I well should) for being negligent in updating the site. I have been extremely busy with Thanksgiving in here. The trouble with not updating sooner is I have forgotten what went on two weeks ago but there hasn't been anything major going on. I did go down and get him in the pool about 10 days ago and we had planned to go last Sunday for a visit and/or outing but we had a snowstorm going on here and in the twin cities as well so we stayed home. Priya and Ben even had a late start to school last Monday morning. </div> <div> Last Wednesday Priya and I went to the cities and did a few things and picked Mark up in the evening to come home for Thanksgiving. When we got there, he was in a "Vertran" brand wheelchair. It is one of the companies whose chair can stand you up in it. That option is great in that chair and it drives very easily and maneuvers well in the standing position. It would be a great chair for some kinds of jobs like teaching or giving a presentation or tooling around in a mall or home or somewhere where there is smooth or ideal flooring. Taken outside on uneven terain or grass it does a horrible job of moving a person about. In the sitting position, ones weight is not distributed over the driving wheels like it is when standing and the wheels just spin! So overall, that is not a good choice for Mark or a couple of others that have tried it out. It was pretty slick though for him to be able to stand up within about 30 seconds by just moving the lever and give his butt a break (!) as well as just seeing him in an upright position. He had a wedding of a college friend to attend yesterday and was planning to take that chair there. I have not spoken with him since to see if he did and how it went. </div> <div> He will be trying out a Permobil brand chair a number of times in the coming weeks or months. They will not leave a chair that has the stand-up option for a lengthly trial for any of the residents because of the liability factor but will allow them to try it for a few hours on a number of different days. However, they will give them a demo chair that has other features but just not the stand-up option for a longer trial to see how their chair can benefit someone and for use in various situations. </div> <bR> <div> Anyway, I got side-tracked with the chair thing there. We did make it home for Thanksgiving too late on Wednesday evening. He didn't sleep real well but that isn't too major. We had our big meal after night chores and milking because Jim had to be at his girlfriend's family gathering earlier in the day. We really had a nice time and we very thankful we could all be together once again. He wanted to go back on Friday because of his friend's weddiing on Sat. but he also had an opportunity to get into the pool with a therapist Sat. am at 8:30 so he figured he better be back for that since he is constantly bugging them to do that. Earl and I took him back leaving home about 4:00 in the afternoon. Greg and Ben did evening chores. Mark wanted to stop at a new chain of "Ultimate Electronics" stores to look around. He is like a kid in a candy store once inside. It really is fun just to watch him and see him enjoy checking out anything new out on the market. From there we went to a Target and for a person that is not a big shopper, he sure enjoyed that too. Then we went out for a late supper to a Mexican restaurant and back to Courage. By the time we got him unpacked and an answering machine hooked up, etc., Earl and I didn't get home till 1:30!! But Mark really did enjoy getting out so I am thinking instead of going down to take him into the pool, I think I will take him out and about to whereever and to restaurants. At least some of the times, I believe he needs that worse than pool therapy! </div> <bR> <div> He is (or maybe has already) moving into the room next door to where he was. I think it is maybe 106 but I will let you know. "Jerrys roomate was "the other Mark" and he was going to be leaving this weekend and moving to an accessible apartment and returning to Courage on an outpatient basis. Jerry (and the other Mark) is also a spinal cord injury patient so they can encourage and hold each other up knowing what they are going through. Mark (and myself) feel really bad leaving Peter because he is such a sweet kid but we are hoping he will have one of his friends move in with him too. So as a result, his phone number will also change and I will post that too as soon as I get it. I tried calling him this afternoon and I did not get an answer so I assume they were moving him. I would have loved to be there to help him/them but I really am exhausted after the last week of busy-e-ness. I hope all of you had a real nice Thanksgiving and can stay sane trying to get ready for Christmas--our next challenge! I am always thankful for all the support we receive from all of you in the form of prayers, cards, gifts, etc. We are sooo blessed. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, November 18, 2003 10:32 AM CST </B></div> <div> Hello everyone,</div> <div> I think I need to update every day because it seems the sun shines when I do!! To start with, the benefit for Mark Saturday night was a great success. You have to know you are the very best people on this earth and I hope God blesses every one of you with tons of extra blessings in the coming months. Every one is so deserving. The core committee did a bang up job and worked so very hard. Many, many people put in hours and hours and many more came and worked from start to finish or worked one or two shifts. They came and seemed to be partying and having fun and did not even seem to be working. I was not in the gym as much as I would have liked to been unfortunately, but I did get a chance to sneek a peek a few times. Young and old, near and far, it was amazing! It just makes a person's heart sing. There is no doubt in my mind that we live in the best place in the world. If we could not have to deal with -20 or -30 degrees it would be the perfect place!! But then I suppose everyone would want to live here so....</div> <div> I can only imagine how pleased God must have been to see everyone living out their faith on Saturday. Maybe you were one that sent an item(s) for the silent auction, or a pan of bars, or a cash donation or just came to enjoy a fantastic meal with us or to say hi to Mark and wish him well. Maybe you were unable to even come because the weather was foggy and not very nice and you chose to say a prayer. Whatever you did, it did not go unseen. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you! To see so many friends, family and community behind Mark and us, is unbelievable. Mark was so happy and really enjoyed himself. He was exhausted by the end of the night but it was so good. He even got to speak with his kindergarten teacher!! There were many people that he visited with that he said he didn't think even knew. It was great, what can I say. I could go on and on with stories. Lots of his high school classmates even came, isn't it wonderful! People we knew and people we didn't know came. WOW!! I will probably continue to add stories over time. We will be forever grateful to you for all your support, both emotionally and financially. </div> <bR> <div> On another exciting note, Mark had a driving evaluation on Friday. He was told that if he does not gain any more movement or strength (which strength wise, he should get stronger) he will be able to drive!!! He was very pleased to hear that. He was then told he would have his first driving lesson on Monday (yesterday!) and he did. We talked to him last night and he was in the parking lot in a vehicle!! He didn't actually drive because some of the levers need to be adjusted to a different position so they are closer to him or something like that. But he will have another lesson this week and I suppose some each week thereafter. How exciting is that??!!! </div> <bR> <div> He is continuing to gain strength in his arms. Many were pleasantly surprised to see that he is able to get both arms up to touch his face now. His left is a bit stronger than the right but he can do it with either. So he can rub some spots on his nose or face to soothe an itchy spot. We continue to pray that he will regain use of his wrists and fingers that remain paralyzed. I am hopeful of his legs but he thinks that will take a miracle. Guess what, I tend to believe in miracles so I'm not giving up yet! </div> <bR> <div> I am going down later this week and will get him in the pool twice. At least that is what we are tentatively planning. I hope he can get in soon with a therapist; they just know more and better things to do than what my limited knowledge can do. He has been there about 6 weeks now; I would think his name must be getting close to the top of the list. I guess that is about all for now. Thank you so much for everything. I can only try to tell you how much we appreciate all you do and have done but it just doesn't always come out right. May God bless you. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, November 14, 2003 8:19 AM CST </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> Looks like we have another sunny day to enjoy! I love it! I don't have a lot of news about Mark mainly because I haven't been there since Sunday (there goes my "best Mom" title Mark has called me on occasion!) and he hasn't passed on anything significant. But I do have to talk a little about the benefit/fund raiser this weekend. </div> <bR> <div> For those of you far away in other states (or even countries), I really wish you could be here to see "Mark's angels" at work. I am not stretching it a bit when I say we truly live in the best part of the world possible. There is no doubt in my mind that we have the best neighbors, friends, families, co-workers, bosses, teachers, business people, community members and on and on anyone could ever wish for. I am absolutely overwhelmed and amazed with the support being shown. There is a general committee overseeing this benefit and they have and are working so hard for the success of it. The numbers of donations coming in is unbelievable. Everyone has been so generous with there time, talents and earthly gifts. There are large and small items of every kind on the silent auction. I think the most unique item that I know of so far (and I only know of about 1/2 the items yet) is the winning game football from "the winningest coach ever". St. John's University's football Coach JohnGagliardi won his 409th games last Saturday earning him that title. I don't know much about him except for what I have read in the St. Cloud Times and heard on media reports but it seems like he is a very humble and kind man. He has worked with football for over 50 years!!! He chose to donate this football that has been signed by all his current players as well as by himself. That is just one of the awesome stories. I want to tell you all the stories but can't of course or I would probably still be writing tommorow! There are some amazing homemade items like quilts-big and small, lots of Christmas craft items, toys, cedar chest, farm items, computer and computer items, baskets, cookies, appliances and electronics, tons of certificates for anything (for services and items). I shouldn't even put any titles of things down because I'm afraid I will offend someone but I want to share the variety of items. I believe they are thinking there will somewhere around 200 items for the silent auction. The ideas and talents are great and many. So you can see why I say this really is the best place in the world! Most of the food that will be served has been donated and there are lots of people that have stepped wanting to help cook and serve so it should be a great success in many ways along with having a lot of fun. It all starts at 4:00 tommorow at Seven Dolors Church in Albany.</div> <bR> <div> I just don't know how we can ever thank all of you adequately. I didn't think anything could top the support our family has been given the last 4 plus months and now this. We will be eternally grateful and indebted to everyone. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU. MAY GOD BLESS EVERYONE 100 TIMES A HUNDRED!! Thank you for your ongoing prayers for Mark. His healing and returning to being as productive as possible in whatever way that is, is the ultimate goal we are all praying and working toward. Without your prayers and help of any type, that would not be possible. Many, many thanks for everything. I look forward to seeing many tommorow and I know many of you can't make, and we really do understand that because there is always so many things going on and we thank you for being there in spirit. I will let you know how it all turns out and Mark will be there and home here for the weekend so I can fill you in on his details then as well. Thanks again for everything and have a great weekend. </div> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, November 11, 2003 9:22 AM CST </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> What a beautiful morning! I love the sun and clear skies. I think it has been about a week since I last wrote and that is getting too long. </div> <bR> <div> Let's see, since last Monday, Mark has been eating more by himself and getting stronger and better at it. There are some foods that are just plain difficult to eat like a taco last Friday night. We could have had him do it if we would have cut it up but then it comes out looking like an unappealing mess and that isn't any fun at all so we helped him. I have not had many chances to be there right at mealtime but the other guys were telling me that he is getting better so that is great to hear. A friend of his, Shelly, was telling me his goal was to eat and push his own chair b/4 the end of October and he did both! </div> <bR> <div> Most of last week was a regular, normal week of therapies, etc. I chose not to go down on Mon. or Tues. because I didn't want to deal with yucky roads. We ended up with about 4 to 6 inches of snow in our area. It was way too early for that but then we are being rewarded with days like today :-) Wednesday night he went to a movie with some of the guys from Courage Center. So I went down Thursday afternoon and we went in the pool and worked hard on some of things we had been shown. He is still on the waiting list to get in with a physical therapist during the week. I left him about 11:00 and stayed at Dee and Jeff's again. Friday morning I did a bit of shopping and then went by him. We were supposed to learn to do car transfers with his main therapist, Erin. Unfortunately she was sick but we did do a car transfer with another gal. Mark felt Erin is a better teacher and more knowledgeable. Jeff & Jack) also came over so he could learn too because then they could take him to their house without having to mess with Metro Mobility. That is a good service but one never knows when they will show up for sure. They consider themselves "on time" if they are within a half hour. If they run past that, then you get a free ride--big deal! It is generally just a pain you know where. For those of you who know Jeff, know that he can put a smile on anyone's face so he is always good for Mark. </div> <bR> <div> Following that session, he had a session of doing pulleys. His arms get attached to the pulley ropes with a band around his arm at different positions. Then on the other end of the rope/pulley, they put on weights. His job is to then pull back or down depending on the particular setup at that time. He does from 10 to 30 repetitions of each one that works a particular muscle. It was getting to be late afternoon by then and I decided I may as well stay and have dinner/supper (depending where you live!) with him since traffic would be crazy esp. with opening deer hunting. In the meantime, a young man named "Joe" was getting a new manual-assist wheelchair. This particular chair just came out in April so we stayed to watch the process and Mark was very interested in seeing if he would be able to move that chair easier. The sales rep had another chair that he eventually put together for Mark to try over the weekend so I ended up staying till about 8:00. It is a manual chair but with electric assistance when you start to push on the outside pushing rim, it kicks in and gives a boost. He was able to move it somewhat but is still too weak for it to work the way it is meant to work but he did make a complete circle around the center area for those of you who are familiar with the layout so that wasn't too bad. It took him well over a half hour but he has lots of time! </div> <bR> <div> I do want to tell you a bit about "Joe" though. It is usually encouraging to see someone who is a few years out from their accident. Joe was in a car accident 3 years ago in 2000. He is now a junior in college at Augustana (I think) and doing very well. His injury was at the same C5-6 level as Mark's and has use of his wrists but he said he did not get wrists back till around 6 months or more out. He has very limited pinching ability with his index and thumb but could hold his car keys. He drives himself and does so from his wheelchair and does not transfer into the driver's seat. He had a good attitude and it was encouraging to see how well he does and I guess I don't have a lot of misgivings that Mark will do equally as well. Whoever coined the phrase "patience is a virtue" must have dealt with a spinal cord or brain injury. </div> <bR> <div> Saturday he was very tired all day, he said. Sunday we went down after Mass and drove the accessible vehicle down as well as our own. We left that there so that either Jim, Greg or some of his friends will bring him on Saturday for the benefit. That will save us from driving down on Saturday. Priya and I did our own thing and Earl and Ben took Mark to a computer store where he was in 7th heaven! There were a number of things he wanted to check out for use on his current computer as well as looking into a laptop or notebook that he wants to plan a way to mount on his wheelchair. Last night I did not get an answer when I tried calling him so he must have been out tooling around or something. I will try calling him as soon as I finish here but I assume there is probably isn't anything new or I would have had a call. </div> <bR> <div> Thanks a million for your continued support and prayers. The prayers are so helpful and appreciated so much as are the cards that many of you continue to send. He often thinks that people are forgetting because it has been 4 months but you keep reminding him thaat he is not forgotten :-) Thanks again. </div> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, November 3, 2003 9:45 PM CST </B></div> <div> Good evening everyone,</div> <div> I know it's hard to believe, but yes, it is snowing outside and yes, I double checked the calendar to be sure I had slept through a whole month! We have about 6 inches on the ground and Earl went back out to the field to see if he can finish up the plowing tonight!! What craziness. Ben and Priya were off school today for a pre-planned workshop/end of quarter day but it seemed more like a snow day. </div> <bR> <div> Mark has had a very good week since I last wrote. He has been working on eating more meals or at least parts of them by himself. Some foods just won't work--YET. So that is pretty exciting. Last Friday my friend Deb T. and myself went down to see him because it was his birthday. Even though I had just been there, I really wanted to go because I felt we needed to celebrate it just a bit more than a normal year. So I baked a cake right away in the morning and we carried it into the dining room with candles burning at lunchtime. It was fun and everyone sang Happy Birthday. We stayed till about 4 or 4:30 and while we were there he had a physical therapy that involved transferring into a manual chair. Guess what?? He moved it by himself!!!! That was very exciting. It was extremely hard work and he went a total of about 100 feet with an occasional boost, but he did it and it was great. They had told him he wasn't strong enough to try it but well, you know Mark.... He went to his home Friday night for his annual birthday/Halloween party. Scott took charge of much of the planning and preparations. From what I heard, they had a good time. Saturday he had another pool therapy with a real therapist. I hope to get there again this week for at least one pool session.</div> <bR> <div> Yesterday, Sunday, my nephew was baptized. Mark was able to get to her house; he passed on the ceremony at church. It was the first time he has been to his Aunt Dee and Uncle Jeff's home since the accident. He was glad to be a part of it I think and we certainly were happy to have him there. She had some fantastic lasagna-one of his favorites-and he ate some of it by himself. That was cool and it was the first time Earl and I got to witness that. I talked with him earlier tonight and he said he touched the side of his nose with his left hand! That was another first. He said now it almost seems like his left arm is gaining on his right. I guess his arms are competing-I hope they keep it up. He said he is thinking maybe he should try eating with his left hand/arm and it might work better. All these things sure help keep his spirits up too. (And mine!)</div> <bR> <div> I think that is about all the exciting news I have for now. Thanks to many of you for donating items for the silent auction. I understand there have been a number of items brought to the Credit Union or some of the committee members homes. You are soo very kind and thoughtful. I also had a phone call tonight and I guess there is an article about Mark and the benefit the community is doing for him in this week's Stearns-Morrison Enterprise. The post office boxes receive theirs this afternoon already whereas we don't receive ours till tommorows mail arrives. Thanks for your continuing prayers as well. They are obviously working. I will sign off for now. Thanks, too, for checking in on Mark and his progress. </div> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Wednesday, October 29, 2003 3:21 PM CST </B></div> <div> Good day!</div> <div> It is Wednesday afternoon and a dreary one at that. It seems we are already starting the sunless, November days. Like many of you, I much prefer the warm, sunny days we had the last weeks. </div> <bR> <div> Last Friday after I wrote that entry, I was very bothered by the fact that Mark was not coming for Steve's wedding so I called him to tell him I would be coming to get him only to find out he was not feeling well at all. As it turned out I think he probably just had some type of common cold but he was coughing a lot Friday morning and they were concerned he may have pneumonia. He had an chest x-ray taken and said he did not want to come to Steve and Marie's wedding 'cuz he felt terrible. Priya called him during the reception that night to find out what the x-ray showed and it was negative. He felt a little better on Saturday and still better each day since. He is still coughing a little but that is part of the problem in that because he basically does not have chest muscles, his coughs are extremely weak so he is unable to bring any phlem up like you and I can with a good, hearty hack! By the way, Mr. and Mrs. Steve St. Marie had a wonderful wedding and Marie sang Ave Maria absolutely beautifully!!! I wish I had a tape of it. If they are ever blessed with children, they will be very lucky to have her singing lullabies to them!</div> <div> He did have several therapies on Sat. which included a pool therapy. Earl and I had another friend's wedding to attend Sat. afternoon. It too, was a very beautiful wedding and enjoyable. All four of these weddings we had this fall had such pretty decorations. They really were fun and nice weddings. Anyway, moving on, I was going to go to visit Mark on Sunday but had the chance to stay home and play in the leaves with Priya because one of Mark's friends came to visit him and they went to the Mall of America for a movie and some shopping. He enjoyed that a lot. </div> <div> Monday was a normal day of therapy for him but over the weekend and on Monday and some meals since he has been feeding himself at least partially. They raise his armrest up as high as possible of his wheelchair, then prop a pillow and he designed some other apparatus with the OT and it works (sort of) for the most part so hopefully before too long, he will need very minimal help to eat :-) I think that is very excitiing. He is also talking about wanting to drive in a few months! He is supposed to have an evaluation by the driving therapists the end of this week and they check what muscles he has that are working versus what he needs to drive and the amount of strength he has compared to what he needs to be able to drive. That info then gets passed on to the OTs and PTs and they can work more specifically on those areas if needed before he would start drivers training. It is an interesting journey to say the least. </div> <bR> <div> Yesterday I had a dental appointment in the morning and then went to work till about 4:45. I quickly went home, gathered up a few things inc. my swimsuit and headed off for the Courage Center. Jim was returning to River Falls since he had class and was about 45 minutes ahead of me on I-94. We were talking when he got caught in a traffic jam/accident (jack-knifed semi) by Weaver Lake Road so I got off 94 and headed south to catch Hwy. 55. That was quite a bit slower with all the stop signs along the way so we did not get into the pool till almost 7:30 but had a full hour in which to work. We did work hard too so I guess it was worth the trip. I decided not to stay overnight and drove back home again. I was tired this morning but a nap and caffeine do wonders :-) Tonight he is going to a movie with the "Trek group" and tommorow Courage is putting on a big Halloween party for the residents. </div> <bR> <div> Friday is MARK'S BIRTHDAY!! Yes, he was a Halloween baby. His friend, Scott, is putting on a party for Mark. Scott's BD was Oct. 20 too I guess. I should have remembered that after all these years but didn't. We have not decided yet if we will go down for the party. It will depend on a chores person. Anyway, that is about all for now. Oh, I forgot, how about those lottery winners/school cooks from Holdingford?? Isn't that just the coolest thing and what a deserving group to win?!! I am so happy for them. For those of you unfamiliar with this area, Holdingford is only about 7 miles from our farm. It is fun to hear their stories. </div> <bR> <div> Keep those prayers going for all the sick and hurting. We can do wonders with prayer. Jill and I were just talking about that at work yesterday and how accepting we have all become to trying to do things on our own and pushing God out of our lives in every respect. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, October 24, 2003 11:27 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello once again,</div> <div> I certainly missed the writing twice a week goal. I will continue to try to improve! It has been a pretty good week. Brenda's wedding was wonderful. She was a beautiful bride and everything went well. Most of us had a lot of fun. Mark really enjoyed seeing everyone and the wedding Mass. He did have a very difficult time at the reception though. Our family enjoys dancing a lot and he isn't quite ready to do that yet although he did dance with Brenda but he said he couldn't say no to her on her special day so that was heartwarming when he danced with her. It was very difficult for him to watch all of us and the cousins having a fun time. He always enjoyed dancing with the cousins and the rest of us when he was able-bodied so that was probably the most challenging event he has had so far emotionally. But he has dealt with it and talked about it so that is good and helps with the healing. Each new thing or event presents another challenge and that is where all your prayers and support come into play. I just can not even begin to imagine where we would be if it were not for all of you. I truly mean that as I sit here typing with grateful tears rolling down my cheeks. I hope no one ever has to experience anything challenging, but if you do or are, please allow us to help you and don't hesitate for a second to call for help or prayers or anything. I just don't know how we can begin to repay or even thank everyone. I ask God often to bless everyone of you and to help you through whatever it may be that is burdening you at the moment. We truly have been blessed by Him and you. </div> <bR> <div> Sunday was a real nice day. It was the first time we got Mark to Mass here in Albany and he was able to see lots more people. We had a nice family lunch with all of our kids home and that is always (usually!!) fun. Jim, Jenny and Greg had to leave right after lunch and then a reporter from the Stearns-Morrison Enterprise came out to interview Mark. They want to run a story on him just before the benefit. Her name was Kristen and she was very nice. The weather was absolutely gorgeous so we enjoyed the afternoon outside. My sister, Jeanne and my parents rode along to take Mark back Sunday night. </div> <bR> <div> I went down Tueday afternoon and took him into the pool Tues. evening. We are getting a little better at it each time. This time I was able to get weights on his ankles and get him to the deep end so his legs and body can be straight and vertical. That is supposed to be very good for all the organs and legs and whatever else. We had tried it another time but his body spasmed so much causing his face to be in the water too much. I guess that can be a bad thing!!!! Oops, poor humor. </div> <div> Wednesday morning he had a check up with Dr. Thompson-his regular physiatrist (sp?) (that is a specialist that deals with spinal cord injuries and whatever else) that took care of him all the time at Sister Kenny. She would be the one to call the shots if anything of concern comes up. For small things, there are Doctors that Courage uses and on call if needed but generally they go back to their regular Dr. if anything of importance comes up. I stayed the day and thought we were going into the pool again Wed. eve. but as it turned out he had an opportunity to go to a movie with a friend so he did that instead. </div> <bR> <div> Yesterday he had a full day of therapies and was tired last night when we talked. Tonight a neighbor and friend of ours and his is getting married. We had originally planned to bring him home again for it but as of the moment he won't be. He has therapies again all day today and has some set up for tommorow (Sat.) morning. Courage posted a notice to their therapists that they can choose to go into work extra hours on Sat. mornings and do pool therapy with residents on the waiting list. So he was lucky to get one of those slots and he is struggling between really wanting to be at Steve's wedding and accepting the extra therapy time. Maybe I will get a call yet and go pick him up. I know he really wants to be here because he and Steve always got along well and had many fun times growing up together so it is difficult choice. Yesterday Ben and his cross country teammates ran in the section meet at Becker. They made it through sub-sections pretty easy but missed out yesterday to compete at state. They came in third and the top two scoring teams move on. There are eight teams in a section so overall, they still did very good but it was disappointing to just miss it. Priya and I went to watch them and cheer them on. The girls team is extremely young with mostly 7th and 8th graders on it. Albany does have one boy and one girl going to state as individuals so that is pretty cool. The state meet is next weekend. </div> <bR> <div> I hope I covered all that could be. Many thanks again for all you do. It means so much to all of us. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, October 17, 2003 10:28 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello everyone!</div> <div> Wow, I am verrry sorry. I did not think it was a whole week since I wrote. I suppose no news is good news. And I do not have bad news so that is good. Mark seems to be doing well and adjusting to the Courage Center. He is trying to be aggressive in his therapy so that is very good. Backing up to last weekend, Greg came home on Friday. He had a day off so he had a chance to farm for one day since it rained then on Saturday. Earl and I attended a wedding for our good friends' son. We really had a nice time and Ben and Bret did the milking and chores. It was very heartwarming since we knew many of the people there and everyone is very concerned about and praying for Mark and our family. The more time that passes, the more convinced I am that is how we are getting through this day to day. Sunday Earl and Greg went to Mark's and then Greg headed back to Winona. Jim picked Earl up on his way home that night and Earl missed chores again!! Almost a record! But it was good for him to get to spend some time alone once with Mark and I thoroughly enjoyed the day at home and took a nice long nap and enjoyed the beautiful outside weather. It was also my Dad's 92nd birthday so my sister, Jeanne, and myself cooked supper for he and Mom and had cake, etc so that was nice too. </div> <bR> <div> Mark had a Dr. appt. with a urologist Monday morning for a basic baseline. Kidney problems can be a big problem for spinal cord patients. So I left about 7:00 am to go with him and spent the whole day on Monday, stayed at Dee and Jeff's overnight and then did some shopping Tuesday am and spent the rest of the day with Mark again. We were able to have someone show us how to get in, out, and manuever the pool Monday afternoon. Mark and I went in again on Tuesday night. It went very well so I hope to get him in several times next week too. </div> <bR> <div> He has had some exciting news for us but says it really doesn't mean much (but I think it is great!) is that he has a new small area on the inside of his left had by the base of his palm near the wrist that has a little sensation and then when I talked to him tonight, he says he is experiencing a trace of feeling on the inside of his right forearm! Neither is a very big area and just because there is sensation does not mean there is or will ever be motor movement but any improvement is always good in my book and it really boosts his spirits. He also told me tonight that he had a full session today of e-stim on his pecks, fingers, wrists, and arms. E-stim is short for electrical stimulation I think. He has also had several sessions of the FES bike which is functional electrical stimulation to the leg muscles. Both these types of electrical stim could help to "wake up" the muscles so to speak. In my book, "naptime" is over :-) </div> <bR> <div> He had several visitors and phone callers again this week. Thank you very much-it sure brightens his days. One very special man stopped by Tues after work. He has visited Mark a number of times over the last weeks and months. His name is Bob and our family got to know his family and friends at HCMC when we were all in ICU and then out on the floor too. Bob was kicked in his face by his horse and had a brain injury. He has come miles in his recovery and still has some left but he is driving short distances (to work, etc.) again and back to work a few hours a day. We met a number of very wonderful people/families through this and maybe that was part of God's plan. Bob has some great family mostly from WI (we won't hold that against them cuz not everyone can be a Viking!) and very good friends Patrick and Pat (husband and wife). They are all so great and we talk every so often. It is a special kind of bond. </div> <bR> <div> Tommorow is our niece and Goddaughter's wedding. Brenda is Earl's brother Merle and Kathy's daughter. Jim and Greg are picking Mark up in the morning and we will all go to Sauk Centre for the wedding Mass and then later to the reception and dinner in St. Joseph. I am sooo glad Mark can be there with all of us and the cousins. I am sure we'll have a great time. Then we will have to let him return to Courage on Sunday. I will take him back sometime Sunday afternoon or early eve. </div> <bR> <div> I think that covers everything this week. I do apologize for not writing sooner. Iwill try to make more of an effort to write at least twice a week. Thanks for checking on him and thanks so very much for your ongoing prayers. It is helping--most definitely. Also for your ongoing support and I hear many of you are volunteering to contribute to the silent auction and help with the benefit! Wow!! Thank you very much. Mark is in awe as are we. You are the best!! Thanks for everything. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Thursday, October 9, 2003 9:08 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> A quick, short update before I go to work today! Yes, I am going back to work part time. Jack and Deb have been great with an open door policy and since there is lots to be done at the studio too, I want to help them out. Jack is an excellent, award winning photographer so come see us and he will do an excellent job that will keep you smiling long after the camera has caught your expression!!! I have had a zillion phone calls this morning it seems. My last one was from the admissions person at Courage needing some info and he said he felt Mark was doing very well for the first week. He said everyone goes through a huge adjustment esp. the first few weeks. We knew that I guess, but it is good to hear it again from a reliable source. He also told me what a great guy Mark is and he wishes Mark would not have to be a resident there, but is glad he is. He figured I already knew he was a great guy being his mother, which I did/do (!!), but it was nice to hear anyway and to hear he is liked and doing well. He felt he is the kind of person that will get the most possible out of their program. </div> <bR> <div> We did not talk to him last night but have every other night and he seemed well to us too. I can tell by listening to him that so far he is not thinking Wow! this is great! but that given the circumstances, it will be good and he will get used to it. It is kind of a double-edged sword. He sees others with spinal cord injuries and it is another reminder that life isn't so great but then he also sees some accomplishments made by others and can see hope plus they really do encourage and support one another. As "Jerry" said to me the other day, we take turns sitting on the pity chair but someone makes sure we are not there very long and sometimes only because we want to take a turn ourself! But he was going to watch wheelchair rugby last night in the gym so I really want to find out if he did any participating or not! He did play rugby in college (I refused to watch any of his games back then because it was too rough) so I'm not sure about watching now in wheelchairs!! He also has a phone in his room now that he can answer by himself (if he is in the room) and the number if you want to call him is 763-520-0784. You can also still reach him on his cell and can leave a message there. He does not have reception inside the building on his cell but does check his messages often if not daily from his land line. </div> <bR> <div> If anyone is so inclined, open swim nights are on Monday and Wednesday evening from 6:30 or 7:00 for 1 1/2 hours and Saturday afternoons (I'm not sure of the times there) and he loves to go into the pool. So if you want, grab your suit and take him in. I KNOW he would love it. I haven't been in yet, but will be soon and I hear the water is extremely warm. It is yet another way you can help him recover and support him. If you let him know ahead of time, they will have him ready in his swim trunks and you can be off and relaxing for however long it works for you. He basically just needs someone to be there with him I guess. The physical therapists are so busy and overworked that unfortunately water therapy comes last. Most of the patients feel it is one of the most important and should come first. </div> <bR> <div> That is about it for now. Keep those prayers going, not only for Mark, but there are so many others that have had tragedies lately and people that are hurting in many other ways. Thanks, too, for your continued support. There just are not enough words in our language is express feelings. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, October 6, 2003 9:30 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good day to all of you,</div> <div> My this weather sure is beautiful; I wish it would last forever! I guess we will appreciate every day now a little more even if it is -20 degrees. </div> <bR> <div> I left Sat. afternoon in a tizzy and as I did Earl told me in passing that he, Priya and Ben would come down on Sunday and off I was. As I was driving, I started to catch my breath and mind and decided that it probably didn't make a lot of sense go down anymore on Sat. being it was late afternoon by then. I called Mark to see how he would feel if I did not go down and he seemed a little bummed but OK. So I continued on to St. Ben's and had 1/2 hour b/4 it closed to drool at the St. Cloud Quilter's quilt show. It was hardly worth it, but for a few minutes I left the "real" world behind and enjoyed the beautiful works of art. Once back home, I continued more tasks that wait to be done and went to Mass Sat. night. Yesterday all of us left by about 9:30, enjoyed a quick breakfast at the Catholic Aid breakfast at Seven Dolors and off to Mark's. He was eating lunch when we got there so we did not take him out to eat as we had planned. But we did take him along to his home to pick up clothes and other things that he needed and wants for the next months. On the way back to the Courage Center, there was an accident just a few hundred feet past the Duluth Street exit (off Hwy 100) that we needed to turn on, so they were diverting all 3 lanes of traffic down the exit and then they could go right back up the other side. Consequently, we sat nearly still in traffic for at least 45 minutes and ended up getting home very late for chores. Needless to say, Earl was an anxious wreck but he and Ben managed to get it all done by about 9:30 anyway.</div> <bR> <div> Oops, I got called away and now it's after 1:00 already. Back to Mark, his spirits seemed good yesterday. He was pretty bummed out when I left on Thursday, so I was kinda worried. I suppose it is to be expected just being a new move, etc. He did get one regular PT session on Sat. Friday he had one OT and one PT but it was all evalution. We were told on Thurs. on check-in that this whole 1st week is very slow and mostly evaluations. I think he is ready to roll. The cervical collar for his neck bugs him and really makes his neck hot, sweaty and itchy. He has not been wearing it at night and is pretty sure he won't wear it the whole month that he is supposed to. Especially since most of the other guys have said they didn't wear it for month. Even by yesterday his neck seemed stronger than the 1st day he had the halo off. He is extremely anxious to get in the pool so if he gets permission, I will go down on Wed. and take him into the pool during open swim in the evening. His friend Jill is planning to take him in next Saturday so that will be good and as time goes on, I hope we can gather up others that would be willing to go in with him. There are open swim nights 3 night a week and on Saturdays I guess. </div> <bR> <div> As for my mother who had knee replacement surgery aboout 10 days ago, she is doing OK. She is already home even though we were told she would be in a swing bed for one to two weeks. I will try and help her as much as I can this week as I try to catch up a bit around here and on some rest. She is an amazingly strong woman. Not much holds her down esp. considering she is almost 82! </div> <bR> <div> On another note related to Mark, I want to let you know about a benefit that many angels around here are putting together on Mark's behalf. I don't know a lot of details but I do know it is going to held on November 15 in the new gym and gathering hall in our church--Seven Dolors in Albany. There is going to be food and a silent auction I believe. I'm sure the core group would be willing to accept help or donations or support of whatever kind. I hate to even bring it up, but I know many of you have asked how you can help as groups or individuals. I just am putting it out there as food for thought. Some contact phone #'s would be 320-845-4987; 320-845-4654; 320-845-7515; 320-352-6065; 320-845-7105. I know there are quite a few others but that should get you in touch with someone if you are interested. Thanks so very, very much for the continued prayers and support. We are so indebted to all of you and I do ask God to bless each of you every day for your kindness shown to Mark and our family. May He bless you in a very special way today!</div> <bR> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, October 4, 2003 3:18 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> This has to be very short. I told Mark I would be down to visit with him and here I am at home still doing things that seem to need to be done.</div> <div> Anyway, I moved Mark to Courage Center on Thursday. He is in room 105B and so far things seem to be ok. I will update on Monday after I spend theweekend with him. I know some co-workers from TestQuest were there last night and he enjoyed that so any visitors are welcome. I will check if there are better times than others but I do know weekends are extremely boring so that is always a good time. There are other things I could talk about, but I better get down there since it is nearly 3:30 already. I will be back home Sunday night or at least that is my plan. I will fill you in then or Monday during the day. Thanks for checking. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, September 30, 2003 10:34 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello to everyone!</div> <div> Wow! An entry two days in a row.........!!</div> <div> IT HAPPENED!!! THE HALO IS OFF!! It was quite a lengthly process in total time but the actual removal is pretty easy. We had to go back to Hennepin County Medical Center because that is where he had it put on. He started with two x-rays in the south building and when we got those, we hand carried them over to the north building to the 3rd floor clinic. Wait, wait, wait and several people (including Trish and Matt-our two favorite three year resident Drs.) popped heads in and out. When Dr. Bergman had looked at x-rays (he had final say), he gave the go ahead. The lady from Winkley (the halo co.) removed the rods and vest. Trish then had him do some flexion and extension with his neck and it went fine. She wrote the orders to do flexion and extension x-rays so off to the south building again to get those. More waiting to receive them and hand carry back to the north building again!! Dr. Bergman checked them and all was well so Mark got the word to have the halo ring removed. It was a matter of loosening 4 screws and wa-la. Just like that he was a free man. On our way out, we made a quick stop in ICU to see if any of his nurses were on duty, but none were or could have been gone to lunch but Mark did get to see the room he spent those awful days in. After 4 1/2 hours we were back on the road to home. Dan was very nice to us and stopped in Monticello and we got a bite to eat. Mark was starved since we ate about 6:00 a.m. and by then it was 1:30 or 2:00. Dan Kohorst from Kozy Cab here in Albany/Farming took us down. It is a service greatly appreciated. </div> <bR> <div> As for the result of having it removed, Mark says he feels like a bobblehead doll. His neck muscles are very weak. He has a cervical collar on and needs to wear that 24/7 for about a month. He also say his whole body feels floppy and feels like he is slouching over and he does somewhat. He was very tired tonight and not feeling very good. I imagine it is a drastic change to the body. He is also experiencing a lot of spasms and quite a bit of pain. So I hope he will sleep well and I won't hear too many "MOMS!" but if I do, I will be there to try and do what I can. He has been such a trooper and his attitude has been pretty darn good most of the time. Thanks to all your prayers, cards, love, phone calls, visits and good wishes. How can he/we not do well. That having been written with all sincerity, I will sign off and try to go to bed myself. It has been a very long day. Many, many thanks for all your kindnesses. Love, Darlene and Mark</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, September 29, 2003 11:37 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> I thought I'd better update quickly b/4 turning in for a few hours. Yes, I get to be up by about 4:15 or so because we are leaviing for Mpls. by 6:15 for Mark to get his halo OFF!! We have been waiting for this day for a long time. I sure hope it goes as planned and it does come off. When the aide was here tonight we gave him a thorough bath, washed hair, I shaved him with a hand razor so he can look his very best:-) </div> <bR> <div> Anyway, for this past weekend.... angels just keep showing up. Earl was making some phone calls to check on vans and someone referred him to the Gregory family. We know them from our children being in 4-H together years back and both our families are/were in the Holstein Assn. They had bought a van for their Dad last year and now want to sell it. So if it will work for Mark, we will buy it but they said they really want us to use it and are happy to help out. Isn't that wonderful??!! Thank you so much to their family. </div> <bR> <div> They brought us the van Fri. afternoon. We had 2 tickets to go to a pre-broadway show in Sauk Centre and I had originally planned to take Ben. All of a sudden Mark said "Mom, I could go now!!!" So Ben decided to let Mark go and enjoy an evening out. We did just that. It was called "A Taste of Rosemary"; a tribute to Rosemary Cluney (sp?) and her music. I recognized many of the songs but Mark knew just a few. We enjoyed it anyway. </div> <bR> <div> Then Sat. night we went to the Felling family party hosted by Mark's cousin Jennifer and her husband Pete along with Cyril and Debbie-Earl's brother and sister-in-law. He really enjoyed seeing everyone and it was a fun time. He did say beer just isn't as good or the same when someone else has to hold your glass so it was another reality check in that respect. Four guys carried him up and down the steps that led to the hayloft where the "barndance" was held. It worked great once we all got past the nervousness!! </div> <bR> <div> I don'tknow if I mentioned my mom had knee replacement surgery last Thursday, the 25th. So we have been trying to keep up with that too. Mostly my sisters have carried the brunt of that but I did take my dad to the hospital Saturday afternoon and we visited for several hours. So by Sunday I was totally beat as were Mark and Earl. We slept for a bit and didn't get much accomplished work-wise but we had lots of visitors so that was nice. We all slept well last night. I think that is about all for now and since it is getting quite late, I better sign off and catch a few winks. Earl is still in the field chopping corn for silage. Those of you who know Earl, know that when he gets a bug, it usually keeps him going way too long or the No-Doz does:-( I will try and let you know tommorow night or Wed. how Mark is doing (without) the halo. Thanks for your continued support and prayers and food. It is appreciated so very, very much by all of us. Love and prayers to all of you. Darlene and all of our family</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, September 26, 2003 4:51 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> Mark just received a call for info on his airplane, so I am taking a quick break from his cares and thought I'd write a little. This week has gone well and passed fairly fast. We found out yesterday that he is going to the Courage Center next Thursday, Oct. 2. So halo off on Tues., home for a day, and then off to Courage. So that is good news. </div> <bR> <div> I have to tell you about Wed. It was like Grand Central Station around here with visitors, angel helpers, therapists, and farm equipment coming and going. Our first visitor was shown the way by my sister, Jeanne. She brought a young man by the name of Aaron Cross. Many of you may know him and may have even heard him speak as he owns a company called Motivation on Wheels and speaks to companies, schools, etc. He is also big into sports but mostly archery and is on the United States Paralympic team and has gained a number of honors there as well. He is from St. Cloud and a very remarkable, capable quad. His injury was at C-6 and does extremely well. He has a fantastic attitude and was a wealth of information for us. He brought us some magazines which we had never heard of that relate to para and quadrapelgia. We had a lot of questions for him and he was more than accomodating. His accident was 12 yesrs ago when he was on his bike during tryouts for the US Olympic bike team and the support van stopped in an intersection that he came through shortly after. Many thanks to him for his openness and sharing his experiences. Thanks to Jeanne for facilitating the meeting with him. Mark is calling, I'll be back........</div> <bR> <div> Later...the OT is here so I'll try again. </div> <div> Our very good, almost lifelong friends Marie & Gary came on Wed. too, and Marie baked breads and spent the whole day in the kitchen cooking something jor other including supper. Sharon came in the afternoon and helped her. They really got a lot done. Marie also insisted I leave the house for a 15 minute walk. It was great except for the fact we got got in a rain shower but had some good laughs in spite of it. Gary enjoyed being a farmer for the day and Earl really appreciated the help and I did. Course Mark was quite disgusted as we forced him to eat some fantastic carmel rolls!!! NOT!!! We have had more delicious suppers and desserts brought by Angie, Betty and Gen. I am getting spoiled by having great leftovers for lunches and not having to cook suppers. Course with the time constraints, we would be eating a lot of sandwiches or frozen somethings. Thanks so very much to all of you. You are so thoughtful and certainly answers to many of the prayers being said. Later Mark's aunt and uncle, Merle and Kathy, came for a visit. Tues. night his aunt Eileen was here and Grandpa Felling was here one night too along with G & G Poxleitner came every day. Grandma had knee replacement surgery yesterday and is doing as well as can be at 82. No, actually she is doing better than the average 82 year old. She has a lot of spunk! Father (our parish priest) was here fora visit too. I know he had some other visitors as well this week. I am sorry I forgot who was here. </div> <bR> <div> Therapy has gone well. I think he has gained a little more strength since coming home. He is driving his chair now all the time without the overhead arm sling so that is an improvement. He has spent a number of hours on the phone chatting with friends, brothers, cousins, and fellow airplane/flying enthusiasts. So between that, reading and being on the computer, he has managed to stay busy most of the time. We are on the downhill slide now so I think we'll make it. I am already startiing to worry whether he will get good care at Courage. As trying as some things have been, I have really enjoyed the opportunity to be able to "mother" him one more time. I'm not sure he feels the same though!! I'm hoping to spend a little more time at Courage the first week or two till he gets settled in but we'll see how things work out as time goes on. There are so many things to catch up on around here esp. with harvest season on us. </div> <bR> <div> i know I had thought of other things to tell you during the week but as happens often, I can't remember now!! Thanks again for all your support. Love and prayers, Darlene </div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, September 22, 2003 4:59 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello,</div> <div> Fall sure seems to be here. Nice and sunny one minute and dark and cloudy the next. That north wind gives one a gentle warning of what is to come and then the next day we are reminded of the warmer, sunny days that just were. We are fortunate to live in a state with such nice weather (well, most of the time!). </div> <bR> <div> Thankfully Mark is doing fine and not feeling sick from the UTI. We found out today that the antibiotic he is on, is sensitive to the bacteria that invaded his body. He also has developed a slight cough. Hopefully, it will remain just that--slight. I'd rather see a cold than pneumonia. So we will keep close tabs on that for the next day or two. For some reason he had the worst night for sleeping so far since he has been home here. I got up with him around 2:00 and was on my way back to bed by about 2:30 and then he started with itching everywhere, headache pain, shoulder pains, etc., etc. Soon he was miserable and just plain could not sleep. I was up and down a number of times and finally by about 4:15 I woke Earl up and told him he needed to take a shift. I covered my head with his pillow and was out soon. Consequently, Mark and I are both tired today but caffeine helps me!! I only allowed a short nap for him so I hope tonight will be better. Eight more days and no more halo:-) YES!! He is spending several hours every day now on his "Fellingized" computer. He certainly is talented when it comes to computer knowledge. </div> <bR> <div> If anyone knows of someone who has a van that has adaptations done to it that we could rent on a temporary basis, please let us know. Mark would like to do some things or go somewhere but trips with a cab service are very expensive. We are especially looking for something for Sat. evening. His cousins and aunt and uncle are having a party/gathering that he would love to go to if possible. Thanks for the visits and phone calls. He/we appreciate(s) it a lot. We truly are blessed to have such wonderful family and live in a great neighborhood/community with super friends. Thanks much for everything. </div> <bR> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, September 20, 2003 9:17 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello everyone,</div> <div> Well we have made it through a few more days. They are not difficult days as far as doing the actual care but far more challenging mentally and emotionally. There have been a few moments where I have felt like I can't make it through the next ten minutes. Somehow time has a way of making things better. If we are fortunate enough to get a good night's sleep, that often helps the next day too. He has been sleeping pretty good most of the time. He does get some pretty severe headaches though at night so they are not fun. The headaches are caused by spasms that go right up into his neck and lock up the muscles tight. I hope they will get less when he gets the halo off on the 30th. (That is the much anticipated date anyway!) Then he could go to Courage on the 1st or 2nd but if I had to put money on it, I would bet it won't be till the following week. </div> <bR> <div> The physical therapist, Doug, and OT, Amy, have been here on alternating days. Twice Doug came early enough in the am to do the stretching and range of motion while Mark is still in bed so that gave me a break. When Amy came on her days, she came late in the afternoon. Four of the five nights there was a home care aid came to help with the night care and helped me get him into bed. Her name is Barb and she does a great job. I am pretty much busy with caring for him from morning till night. Afternoons are a bit better and that is when I should be doing some things but I usually end of taking a nap because I am sooo tired. Friday (yesterday) a friend of ours (Deb T.) came bearing treats and stayed with him so I left and went into St. Cloud for a few hours and ran some errands that were long overdue. In spite of running from place to place as fast as I could, it was nice to get away for a bit. Thanks, Deb. Many thanks also to Sharon W. for coming several days and helping with a some things and allowing me to cry on her shoulder when needed. I am very thankful to Ruthie L.; Ann C. for bringing very delicious suppers this week. It makes it real easy to gain weight. Those darn kit-kat bars! They are addictive! And my cousin JoAnn brought old-fashioned "epphl strudel" (apple strudel). Such good treats; thanks to one and all. He also had several welcome visitors this week (in addition to the meal bearers and neighbors). It helps to pass the time and take his mind off things. Steven, Marie, and Carrie-know that you were great morale boosters:-) Please know that you are all welcome to come and visit. Usually afternoons or early evenings are best. I sure hope God blesses all of you for all your kindnesses and prayers. It sure helps us to make it through those seemingly impossible moments. </div> <bR> <div> I suspected Mark was getting a urinary tract infection yesterday. Ben took a sample in for me this morning and sure enough........so we got an antibiotic and hopefully it is the right one. The bacteria is being cultured out and by Monday they will know what type it is and if he is on the right antibiotic. Course by then we will know too if it is working and he is feeling better with no fever. </div> <bR> <div> Thursday Earl and Ron went to Mark's hanger at Flying Cloud Airport and brought the wreckage home. Personally, I hope it becomes invisible soon because I have a hard time looking at it. I had my first good look tonight right along with Mark. It is nothing more than a pile of junk on a trailer now. It was not quite that bad initially but got worse when it they removed itfrom the wreckage site and then to get it home again. Now it is really a depressing site. I think that is about all for tonight. I guess it is time to get him to shut down his computer and get him ready for and into bed. Hopefully I will be able to update sooner next time if possible. Thanks again for everything. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, September 15, 2003 10:57 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> Sorry I have not updated for so long. I know many of you check daily only to find old news. We have five full days in now at home. Yes, it is a challenge-a big one but it is a labor of love and I still know I did the right thing bringing him home versus going to a nursing home. My whole day is pretty much consumed with caring for him. Late afternoons and early evenings are a bit better. Our day starts with a litany of things to do including about an hours worth (or more) of stretching and range of motion while still in bed. He ends up getting breakfast in bed that way:-) All the stuff in the morning usually takes me till about noon and by then I am ready for a nap! Not an option! The last few days we were pretty lax about strengthening therapy but today we spent a lot of time this afternoon doing that and my goal is to do several sessions of strengthening every day so we'll see.</div> <bR> <div> Some exciting news is that Ben got his computer set up and all the plugs in the right spots so it at least ran on Thursday night. Then Friday afternoon, I followed directions on redoing things to get it to do what he wanted. Using his creative mind,we plugged two mice in. With the "overhead arm sling" on his right hand/arm he is able to move one mouse that directs the cursor. We tape a fairly short pencil (with the eraser extending just beyond the end of his finger) onto his "tall man" finger on the left hand and then tape all the fingers together and then with something called a "mobile arm support" on his left arm he is able to click the 2nd mouse on the cursor spot selected by the 1st mouse on the right hand. If that makes sense to you, you are doing great! But it works and by Sat. night he sent his first email by himself!!! He also put Dragon Naturally Speaking program which is a program that directs the computer to do what you tell it to by speaking. It works fairly well but sometimes it has a mind of its own so he has a few bugs to work out yet. But it is a start anyway. Thank God he has such great computer skills and an inventive mind. </div> <bR> <div> Yesteray we celebrated my parents' 60th wedding anniversary!! What an accomplishment. We had a small group of our immediate family and their living siblings and next door neighbors. It was really a very nice time. My sister ordered a care cab for Mark so he was able to be there too and my nephew, Johnny, was there from Washington. It was the first time he had been home in several years so it was great to have everyone together and get some full group family photos. If it could have been planned sooner, then we could have planned for some professional ones which would have been my choice but life throws some curves once in a while. </div> <bR> <div> Otherwise we continue to take it one day at a time. He was very depressed tonight. It is very understandable given the circumstances with none of his regular friends visiting and the lack of activity at Sr. Kenny. Even though it was a regimen of therapy and routine, there were always people around. He has gone outside several times but again it is a reminder that he is unable to do anything that we/he sees as constructive. Please continue to pray that we all receive the needed strength and patience to carry one and for healing. Your encouraging words that you share wherever we see you or talk to you mean so very much. Thank you again and again. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Thursday, September 11, 2003 7:03 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> We are now home in Albany for 26 1/2 hours and all is well! Sharon, our neighbor, brought supper for all of us. She is such a sweetheart and it was wonderful to have a hot, home-cooked meal ready to go. It was also Ben's BD and she even made him a cake! We might do another cake this weekend because Greg and Jim will both be home so that will be fun. All of us have only been together once since Mark's accident and that was quite brief at HCMC. </div> <bR> <div> Mark and I both slept very well indeed. I got up once with him about 1:45 and again about 5:45 to take care of things that needed to be done. After I had Priya and Ben off for school, I went back to bed but that only lasted a few minutes till the phone started ringing:-( A home health care nurse (Laura) from Albany Community Hospital came out this morning. Tommorow a PT will be coming and we don't know about the OT yet. We were pretty lax today with therapy today mostly due to my inability to keep my eyes open and function to any degree. My goodness, I am so tired today. I'm sure it will get better once we settle in. Mark is EXTREMELY bored though. Being home is good but he just can't DO anything. It is another reality to face and deal with. So we are going on the internet as soon as I am finished here. We also have his computer here and imagine this, I'm supposed to try and set it up!! That could be quite a feat! He has a Dragon Voice program that we can put on his if we get it up and running. If Priya and Ben could just come home early from their Cross Country meet......... </div> <bR> <div> I also made the appointment with Dr. Bergman to get the halo off. It is set up for Tues, Sept. 30! Yippee!! I was informed that it is carved in stone for 12 weeks so we had to count off 12 weeks, twice! I would have shot for the 23rd since that is the 12th week, thought they would probably say 12 weeks are not up until the 25th so rather than risk getting sent home, I went for the 30th. They only remove them on Tuesdays. Reason being, that the company called "Winkley" that put it on is only at HCMC on Tuesdays for removals. He has to go back there because that is where he started. We have to be there by 8:30! UGH! Following that, I called the Courage Center to inform Kurt, the intake person, that he will be ready to start there after the 30th. He told me he will have a potential discharge on the 1st and he could go as soon as Oct. 1. So I will plan for the 2nd or 3rd since that would be considered "on time" for most things. That is about all for now. Thanks for checking in and your ongoing cards, phone calls, prayers, etc. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, September 9, 2003 7:11 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> One more day down and still on schedule to go home tommorow. It was a very busy day and a lot of it being the right hand not knowing what the left is doing or bothering to let the left hand know--if you know what I mean. Mark also got a different motorized wheel chair today that he will go home in. We spent at least one hour ormore getting that configured close to the way it should be. The one he was in was very old and a lower end chair I guess. This one is newer and should have more power, sleeker lined,etc. The old one was front wheel drive and very few chairs are made that way anymore. Most are now rear wheel drive. The big exciting thing today was he was driving his chair without the overhead arm support. He will go home with the overhead support but he did quite well without it and they really want him to work at driving without using it. Yes!!! Another little step on the way to the finish line. So his arms are getting stronger. I hope we can maintain that at home and ideally improve on it. He also started on the Dragon voice-activated program on the computer but it takes a while to get it all set up and the therapy sessions are only 1/2 hour long so I'm not sure how far he will get tommorow b/4 it is time to go home. </div> <div> I don't have much other news other than it is still very hot for this time of the year mostly due to the extremely dry weather. I will sign off and go check on him. One of his friends, Cory, is here for another visit. He has been very faithful with his visits so I took advantage of this time to update. It is also his shower night so I'm hoping I can go to Dee & Jeff's pretty soon and get to bed early since Ihave to be here very early again tommorow. They think I have a short memory and want me to refresh it. Can you imagine that??!! And I'm sure it will be a very long, stressful day too. I hope I will be able to update but if not, maybe I can on Thursday. Please continue to pray and hope for a full recovery if that be God's will. Thanks again for everything. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, September 8, 2003 6:55 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Good evening friends, family & everyone else!</div> <div> I will try to update you while Mark is snoozing. I would like one of those naps but maybe later:-) Yesterday (Sunday) am was a semi-normal Sun. morn. except I worked like crazy trying to get a little more done with the bedrooms before Mass. After Mass, we stopped back home to grab some clothes and swimsuits and the four of us were off to Mark's house. Priya and Ben were able to go along because Jim stopped by and could take them home to Albany with him. Mark was there already when we got there and Scott (another angel, bless his heart, he is the greatest friend Mark could ever wish for) had built a semi-permanent/temporary ramp for Mark with Matt's help on Sat. night too. It must have been the day to build ramps! WE spent the afternoon there and Dee, Jeff and their kids along with Jill were all there. Mark stayed till about 8:00 b/4 going back to Sr. Kenny. </div> <div> Earl and I went to the Chanhassen Dinner Theatre. We saw the Sound of Music and thoroughly enjoyed the show and dinner. Afterwards we stopped by Mark's house and picked up his TV and his computer, monitor, etc. Guess what I'll be doing in any spare moments and it won't be quilting:-( Then we finally got to sleep at the hotel Jim had reserved. We both slept so sound from being so very tired from the weekend. This morning we came to Sr. Kenny to learn transferring in a manual Hoyer (the kind we'll be getting at home) and sliding board transfers and some other things were gone over. We also got all the equipment finalized and ordered for tommorow's delivery. The plan is for Mark to leave here at 1:30 on Wednesday. </div> <div> Earl left about 4:00 and I stayed without a vehicle:-( But Jeff picked me up on his way home from work and I took one of their vehicles and came back to spend the evening with Mark. I need to be here to ride home with him on Wed. and to cover a few more things tommorow. So that should cover where we are at with things. </div> <div> I don't know if I mentioned the other day that in one of his technology therapy sessions and again today he was moving a mouse around. We just need to figure out a way to "click" it. We/They are also trying to figure out a bookrest or something to put a book or magazine on so he can read and better still if we can figure out a way so he can turn his own pages. Yessss</div> <div> I better go and wake him up and go outside for a stroll. Some fresh air is always good. Many, many thanks for all your love, prayers, and support. We really appreciate it so much (and need it!). Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Sunday, September 7, 2003 1:10 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good evening/morning,</div> <div> Wow! What a day this was. I spoke of angels in this morning's entry. As this day turned out, we were surrounded by angels. Ron Paulsen, a friend, went with Earl and like most things, disassembly of the ramp was more work than thought. But they accomplished the mission and were back here about 4:30. In the meantime, Ben had taken care of the cows and was baling. Priya had dance and a piano lesson and then off to a birthday party. I was working on switching bedrooms when our friends, Marie and Gary, came bearing about a bushel of their home-grown tomatoes! Marie and my mom helped skin them and we put them into the freezer instead of canning them. They were beautiful. Earl realized he needed help to get this ramp together so called my cousin and our neighbor Bob F. He came with Yvonne and their son, Dan and together with Ron, Gary and Ben they finished the project about midnight! It worked great. If that isn't Divine intervention, I don't know what is. Yvonne helped with the tomatoes and cleaned the garage. It hadn't seen a broom for way too long! Bret, our neighbor kid, came and did the milking and chores so Earl could keep working on the ramp and help another one of our neighbor set rafters on a building he is putting up. Thanks Bret for going the extra mile. I owe you some bean dip!! Sandy (Ron's wife and my friend) and her sister stopped by for a bit and tonight another one of our very good friends, Pat H., stopped by with a monitor for us to use and a wonderful, long overdue visit. Her husband, Tom, was in a very bad accident almost 4 years ago and we were all afraid of losing him that time. And Jill was by Mark so he had a visitor earlier today and I didn't get a chance to talk to him tonight anymore. So you can see we were surrounded by many of God's helpers today and accomplished many tasks. Thanks a million to all of you. It is so very heartwarming and overwhelming. I just don't know how we can ever thank everyone in a way that you are so deserving of. I say a pray for everyone every day so I hope for the moment, you are being helped too. Thanks again for everything. </div> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, September 6, 2003 9:37 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> Another beautiful day ahead. We certainly could use some rain; it is so very dry around here and I think all of MN and most of the upper midwest is very dry. Our crops are not too bad because we are blessed with heavier soil but Earl went to an auction farther south last week (and bought a combine) and said many farms already had chopped corn for silage because it was all dried up. Minus the rain issue, the sun is very enjoyable. </div> <div> Sorry I didn't get to update yesterday. We have been extremely busy getting things lined up for Mark's homecoming! There are many items needed for his care and to help him to be comfortable. I am working on moving bedrooms around. Priya will take Greg's room, Earl and I will take her room so we can be near him if he needs us, and he will take our room. It would have much simpler if he could have just taken Priya's room but he would have to make a turn there with his wheelchair whereas our room he can drive straight in so that is why we are doing some rearranging. I hope by the end of today, I have that mission accomplished. </div> <div> Then we have the ramp issue. Earl thought he would be calling recruits in to build one quickly and Mark called yesterday and said there were some angels working and someone at the Sr. Kenny knew of an angel that bought a home that has a ramp and wants to give it away! After playing some telephone tag, we made contact and think it should work with minimum modifications to use here at home. Earl's brother, Merle (& Kathy) own Felling Trailers/Sauk Centre Welding and Machine Works and are borrowing us a trailer so Earl will leave here shortly to go to Fridley (a Twin Cities suburb) to get it. Often we wonder if God is hearing us or we wish we could see him face to face. Well, He is listening and we are seeing him face to face in all these wonderful people/angels. "If you do it for the least of my brethren, you do it for me." The rest of the equipment seems to be coming together and should be delivered Mon. or Tues. </div> <div> Earl and I are going to see Mark tommorow and will take him to his house with the help of Metro Mobility. I think that will be very difficult emotionally for him. I know it is very hard for me every time I have been there. I see all the improvements he has made and projects he had/has in progress. Oops, I already can't see through my tears.......</div> <div> We are both staying over tommorow night and Jim and Ben will do chores and milking. Jim's Christmas gift was a night away from the farm with him doing chores and paying for a hotel room. So we are planning to go to the Chanhassen Dinner Theatre and try to enjoy the evening out. Today is our 28th wedding anniversary so we will try to squeeze our celebration in and use the gift all at once. Monday morning we have to be at Sr. Kenny early so I see again what they do and Earl will learn what goes on in Mark's routine. I think he will come home on Tues. or Wed. </div> <div> That is about all for now. His arms are getting stronger slowly. He has been sleeping well pretty much all the time now so I am very glad for that. It took almost 2 months for that to happen. Otherwise he is very healthy. So there are many positives going on. He had his 2nd month neck x-ray the other day and that looked good again with everything in place where it should be. So hopefully he will get the halo off on schedule--3 months after the accident which will be October 2.</div> <div> Thanks for all you do for all of us. We couldn't make it through without all the support. Love, Darlene </div> <bR> <div> <B>Thursday, September 4, 2003 7:08 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> I am writing this from Sister Kenny's if you can believe that! I was supposed to be back here by 7:00 to learn how to do some of his early morning cares. I am here and he is sound asleep yet so his nurse is not as on time as she thought. But that is OK; it gives me a chance to update. Yesterday was a pretty good day. We got the news that it will work for Albany Hospital to do Home Care with/for Mark. There is a equipment gal that is working on getting together the things we will need at home and I made a bunch of phone calls to. I think it will all come together in time. Right now they are looking at between a Monday and Wednesday discharge date. So I will here today to learn and probably go home tonight (that is my plan now--always subject to change!) and come back on Saturday with Earl and we will both stay over to learn how to transfer and whatever else we need to learn yet. </div> <div> Tammy just came and is ready to get started so I better go help/learn. If there is more, I will write again tonight, otherwise tommorow. Thanks for everything and keep praying. He IS listening! Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Wednesday, September 3, 2003 9:12 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning everyone,</div> <div> I am writing this from Dee & Jeff's house in Mpls. I could have maybe gone home last night but I was so tired, I was an accident waiting to happen! My first stop yesterday was St. Benedict's in St. Cloud to see why he could not go there. I was told he does not meet their criteria. In her words they are a sub-acute care center so they feel when he leaves there, he should be rehabilitated enough to go home and unfortunately I had told them that he will be going to Courage after that. So I'm not sure if that is it or not because the social worker here kind of indicated there is some politics involved. Whatever....... At any rate the good part is that he will not be leaving Sr. Kenny today as was originally planned because he has no where to go!! So we are happy about that. The down side is his options from here are home or a long-term care facility or nursing home. I will not send him to a nursing home so we are making plans to come home to Albany. I may be taking many of you up on your offers to help with "anything" if you are still able, available and willing. We think it may be a challenging month but now it will be shortened a little bit because Dr. Thompson didn't think everything would be in place to leave this week yet. There are many details to work out and training for me/us to do so it will still be a very busy week but the brunt of the responsibility won't be on me till next week. We decided if it would become impossible to do, we can always go to a nursing home. I guess we need to start a facility for the people that fall through the cracks. So I will keep you posted when we have a final discharge date. </div> <div> Last night I gave him a haircut before his shower. That was a bit of a challenge around and behind the bars but it didn't turn out too bad. After that we gave him a shower in a chair instead of on the plastic gurney that was usually used. Liz was his nurse and if you knew her, you would know why we were able to accomplish that:-) I must say, he looked very handsome after a haircut and shower. It wouldn't be because I'm his mother??!! No, no, it really is true:-) Oh and I removed the purple toenail polish. I wanted to re-polish them but I decided if looks could kill........the temptation is certainly there though. </div> <div> That is about all for now I think. He had several visitors yesterday and last night and you are so appreciated. I'm sure he gets sick of my face; imagine that!! But if you were wishing you could have made it down to visit yet b/4 he was leaving, you now have a few more days. Thanks for all your prayers. They are helping; obviously God did not want him at St. Benedict's Center. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, September 2, 2003 7:02 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> Oh my, I am just too tired for just having been up a little while. Driving every other day to the cities and back is tiring. Last time I wrote was Sunday afternoon. He did fine on Sunday-a little bored but survived. He had only one visitor or none, I can't remember what he said. Yesterday Priya, Ben (he hadn't been there in a while) and I went down early in the morning and I learned how to do a procedure with him and then we took him to Como Park. Jim and his girlfriend met us there and Jim brought food for a picnic so that was fun. We went through the conservatory and the zoo. Mark and Priya took Metro Mobility over there at 11:00 and then the ride back to Sr. Kenny was scheduled for about 5:00. Ben rode back with him and they made it back b/4 Priya and I got back! But we visited a few minutes with Dee & Jeff I guess. They stopped by, along with their children, to say hi to Mark for a bit about 4;30. When we got back to Sr. Kenny another aunt & uncle, Cyril and Debbie (Earl's brother and his wife) and 2 of their daughters were there waiting for him to return to visit for a while. Their daughter, Jessica, was a runner-up for Princess Kay of the Milky Way and had her head carved in butter so they had to pick that up at the State Fair and move her back for college too. So Mark enjoyed his day a lot yesterday; it made up for Sunday I guess:-) To Loree and LaVane: Mark felt so bad he missed you again. He said every time you have stopped, he was on his way to therapy or gone or something. Thanks so very much for thinking of him and taking the time to visit. He really does appreciate it. </div> <div> I better sign off here and get in the shower. It is the first day of school for Priya and Ben as well as all Minnesota children so once I have them off and on their way, I will be heading right back to the cities to the attorney's office and see what we can figure out for Mark for September. Thanks again for all your support, whether by email, phone, guestbook, calls, visits, and most of all, your prayers. I don't think I (we) could make it through this without God's help and your support. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Sunday, August 31, 2003 1:03 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello everyone,</div> <div> We survived a trip to the fair and on a Saturday too yet! It was a very busy day there with tons of people. Mark and Jill took metro mobility from Sr. Kenny to the fair and Earl, Priya and I drove to Brookdale and rode the bus from there so we did not have to deal with waiting in the miles of lines to park,etc. Mark's pick up time was at 11:10 or so and he was not scheduled to be picked up again from the fair till 7:46 which in actuality turned out to be about 8:20 so it was a long day for him and I think he was very tired and starting to hurt a little. But all in all, he enjoyed it a lot especially once he got to the technology building. He is definitely in his element there!! He just glows and did not notice any bumps in the floor or did not have anything bother him while in there!!! It was fun to see him get so excited about something. He also enjoyed many various foods that we all tried and shared samples of. I guess even that stuff beats hospital repeats! Now I enjoyed the creative arts building the most. The talents of people that made quilts, beautiful paintings, woodworking, textiling, and so many different things that one does not think of on a day to day basis is awesome for me. So that was my highlight. Priya was a little bored because we had to move a bit slower than she wouldhave liked but she is always a good trooper. We got home about 10:30 so it wasn't too bad. </div> <div> On another note relating to yesterday's entry, if anyone knows of a subacute center that you think might be a good fit for him, please give us a call or shoot us an email. I have looked on the internet and not finding a lot of satisfaction. So any help or ideas you might have would be greatly appreciated. You might have the one that could work!! I want to try to get some things done around here and we want to go to a 50th anniversary yet this afternoon too and Earl just went out to bale some hay so it is another busy day. I hope everyone is enjoying these last days of the unofficial summer b/4 school starts once again. The weather sure is perfect for a Labor Day weekend. Thanks and love to everyone. Darlene</div> <div> P.S. It was good to see you, Sandy! </div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, August 30, 2003 10:04 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> Just a quick note here b/4 we leave for the state fair with Mark. I talked to him last night and asked if he had heard anything from the social worker if St. Benedicts in St. Cloud could take him or if they had an opening and he said that the social worker said she had a voice mail from them saying it would not work and did not say why. she tried to call them back but they were already gone for the day/weekend. So that puts us back to square one as to where he can go during September so I am putting out a request for a high powered prayer alert. Please help us pray so God will find a good place for him to go or so it all works out. You know what I mean I think. I'm sure it will work out in the end but we want to have good care and therapy, etc. It is always something new. Otherwise he had a good day and Jill was there when we called and Jim had just come back from a vacation in CO and stopped in. I think some people from work had been there too. Thanks to so many of you that have stopped in to see in at some time or another. He really enjoys that. Better run. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, August 29, 2003 10:15 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> We have a very busy week. Mark keeps working on therapy and enjoying his visitors. He has been in a standing frame a number of times and when I have seen him in it, I just enjoy seeing him in a vertical position. Steve, the wheelchair man, told us one company makes a chair with an option (very spendy one, but....) that will put the person into a standing position right from the chair instead of owning a separate standing frame and transfering to and from it all the time. We will certainly check that out months down the road when he is ready to purchase a chair. </div> <div> Wednesday was my first day back to work. I left a bit early but it was great to be back and do something "normal". I can't imagine how Mark must feel knowing that even a "new normal" is a long way off. I really enjoyed being with Jack, Deb & Jill again. Jack & Deb have been so understanding and accomodating. They are great people to work for and with. I really appreciate that a lot too. Ben went to Valley Fair with a friend so it was just Priya here with us and she was helping Earl with some chores so I had a quiet hour or two to do more paperwork and I even "just sat" in a relaxing chair for about 15 minutes! It was great. We called Mark when Earl came in from chores and talked with him for a quite a while again. </div> <div> Yesterday I had an appointment to tour St. Benedict's Center in St. Cloud as a possible option for Mark for September. They have a subacute unit for people recovering from surgeries like knee and hip replacements, accidents of all types and whatever else. It is a separate wing from the nursing home. Unfortuately when I was there yesterday, most of the current residents were still elderly but looked to be in good health of mind and body. There are not many options for this in-between thing. I am still hoping they can come up a reason for him to be able to stay at least another week at Sr. Kenny but for now he is scheduled to leave Sr. Kenny next Wednesday. There is therapy at other facilities but it is not nearly as intense it seems. We will all be very happy for him to get his halo off and move to the Courage Center. After I was done with my tour I had to rush off to Mpls. to the attorney since they had called in the morning right b/4 I left and needed me there to sign some papers. So after that we ( my friend/cousin was with me) went to Mark's. He was down in the gym for therapy when we got there and so was a young man named Andrew. He is 18 years old and had a severe spinal cord injury at the C4-5 level in February. He had been at Sr. Kenny and is now at Courage. He was back for a Doctor's visit and came down to see some of his old therapists. We were so encouraged and impressed with the progress he has made. He said he had even died initially! His pinkie on his right hand move very similar to what you and I move ours. He had pretty good movement of his arms, esp. the left one. He can reach/touch his face so it renewed my hope again. He said too, once you get that halo off, it makes such a difference. Speaking of halos, many of you know Duane Pung from Freeport. He was scheduled to get his off yesterday and he was on my mind all day. I talked to Kathy (his wife) this morning and YES, it happened!! She said it was great and he was so happy to have it off and be able to turn his head some and they washed his chest and back off really good. I imagine they feel somewhat top heavy since the vest and halo weigh about 8 to 10 lbs. if I remember right. I will be excited to even get a date but I hope it will be the beginning of Oct. </div> <div> I got home abuot 11:30 last night so it was another long day. Tommorow Mark, Earl, Jill, Priya and myself are taking Mark to the State Fair. Unfortuately, it will still be a very long weekend for him since Monday will be as quiet around there as Sundays are so we are going to have to get creative for that day or empty the lakes to send visitors!!! If I don't update tonight, I hope all of you have a very enjoyable, rest-filled and most of all, safe weekend. Thanks for the notes on this website and private emails you have sent to him. We checked it all last night b/4 leaving for home and he is always amazed with all the people that care enough to take the time to write, pray, send cards, call, etc. Thanks tons. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, August 26, 2003 11:29 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello everyone,</div> <div> I am back home in Albany. I just got here a little bit ago. Today Earl came down and we took care of all kinds of legal business. I hope we are doing it right; I guess in a few years we'll know. We are also working on where he will go next Wednesday. I wish that was settled too. There is just no end. It seems we get one task finished and then there is something new that comes up. I guess that is the way it will be for a while. I will go back on Thursday or Friday. </div> <div> Otherwise Mark and I had a better evening last night than what the rest of the day had been. He had one of his favorite nurses, Su. No, that is not a mispelling and she is not oriental like she says everyone thinks she is because she spells it without the "e". She does a lot of teasing and Mark gives it back to her so b/4 long, she had him smiling. He also had her on this evening's shift. But overall, we both had a better day today. He has been sleeping better (finally!) the last few days so I hope that corner has been rounded. Movement is about the same, maybe a bit stronger. He is definitely getting better at moving his chair so that is very good. I think that is about it for today. Brenda and Pat (cousins) were there tonight so they were still visiting when I left. Better get a little sleep. Thanks for everything. All the encouraging words, prayers, cards, phone calls, etc. are appreciated more than you can imagine. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, August 25, 2003 1:48 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello everyone,</div> <div> I am writing from Sr. Kenny right now. Mark is down in therapy at the moment. Sat. morning he was bored and lonely. I was home yet trying to get Priya and Ben ready for school. Friday Priya and I went after we attended a funeral and Saturday I took Ben into St. Cloud. Both are running Cross Country and desperately needed new shoes so we got that mission accomplished along with some new clothes. Anyway, he had all his visitors Sat. afternoon and evening. I left home early Sun. am to come down here. In the afternoon Mark and I once again went to the Mall of America. We were going to go to Dee and Jeff's but Mark is very apprehensive about how he get into the house, etc. so we went to a couple of movies. One was "My Boss's Daughter" and the other was "American Wedding". Since I am not a big movie/TV person, 3 movies in 2 weeks is way over my quota. They were humorous to a point but also kinda dumb and some very sick humor by my morals. Oh well... Then we went to Famous Dave's for supper b/4 getting back here about 9:00. </div> <div> This morning I went to his house to get paperwork things. I hate it every time I go there; it just hurts soooo much. I thought I had pulled myself together by the time I got back here only to find he is feeling hopeless and down so I am keeping Kleenex in business again. Sometimes I wonder if I will make it through this nightmare. Still don't know what where he will go for Sept. I hope that is settled by the end of the week. I don't think there is much else new for now. Please continue to pray for Mark as well as so many others in need of our prayers. Thanks so much for everything once again. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, August 22, 2003 11:24 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Good evening,</div> <div> Earl and I just spent about 1 1/2 hours on the phone with Mark. He was feeling a little bummed but not bad. He seemed tired too but said he was not sleepy yet. So we talked about options for September and what we might do this weekend. (Maybe Como Park) Next weekend he is hoping to go to the State Fair for part of one day. Therapy was about the same as every other he said. They did get him up into a standing type piece of equipment today to put some weight onto his legs to help minimize bone loss. He was in that position for about 15 minutes and did not experience any light-headedness or anything so that was good. </div> <div> Over the last few days two people have asked me how much is he able to move his arms, etc. He can lift them off the arms of his wheel chair about 1-2 inches. His hands are not working at all yet. His biceps are the strongest and triceps are working but very weak. Then there are the deltoids and a number of others that I'm not sure what the names are without writing them down. Many have some function but are very weak. It is such a slow process and we know that but somehow it just seems we don't want to believe it or can't comprehend it so we think/wish it will happen quicker. </div> <div> Oh, by the way, I know many of you read this site but prefer not to write a note to him in the guestbook but would like to communicate with him directly via email. His email address is mfelling@yahoo.com Mark and I check his email and do things on the computer periodically (at least once week--more if time permits) so he will get your messages then if you would rather write him personally. </div> <div> I think that is about all for now. I will update again in a day or two!!! Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Thursday, August 21, 2003 10:53 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning everyone,</div> <div> Tuesday was a normal day of therapy for Mark. Jill (his girlfriend) came back from out east. She was in a good friend's wedding there. Unfortunately, he did not sleep well again on Monday night. He slept till 2 am and then was awake the rest of the night. Tuesday night was somewhat better he told me yesterday morning. Yesterday, Wed., I started my day early by going to St. Cloud to check out what they have to offer in the way of out-patient therapy. So far, Mark is still scheduled to leave Sr. Kenny on Sept. 3 which was 2 weeks from yesterday. We have the month of Sept. to deal with b/4 he can go to the Courage Center. They have a policy of not taking resident patients in halos and he will not get his off till the beginning of Oct. We do not have a date for that yet but initally they said 3 months for the halo. The Courage Center is working on changing their policy to admitting patients with halos and we were told was possible Mark could have been a pilot patient, but my hope is dwindling. So far, we or Sr. Kenny's social have not heard anything positive. So anyway, I am trying to figure out options for living and ongoing therapy during Sept. so he will slide backwards. </div> <div> Mark went on a theraputic outing yesterday to the Minnesota History Museum. When we talked to him last night, he said he enjoyed it but his arm was aching because he had moved his chair himself through the trip!!! YES!! I have not yet talked to him this morning to see if it still hurts and how he slept, etc. My Mom just told me that she just got a call from Bernie Sand (maiden name), a wonderful lady that grew up on the farm next door to ours. (Earl and I live on the farm where I grew up) She just happened to be at the same place the same time Mark was there. She had come to visit us at HCMC when he was still in ICU and had not seen him since so was taken aback when she saw him yesterday. In her shock, she couldn't remember his name and asked him if he was a "Poxleitner"? That was my maiden name and I'm sure she remembers me easiest by that as I do her. Cutely, he answered "yes". So that was fun for me to hear. Thanks Bernie for taking a minute to visit with him again. </div> <div> Last night Earl, Priya & her friend, Katie, and myself went to the Princess Kay cornation at the State Fair. Earl and I are on the Stearns County American Dairy Assn. Board so we hosted one of 3 buses that went down. Our niece, Jessica, was one of the candidates and did very well. She was the first-runner up!! We were of course disappointed that she was not Princess Kay but very happy at the same time that she did so well. Stearns County had 3 girls in the final competion so we were really hoping for a winner, but when you get that far into the competion, everyone is really good. </div> <div> I need to back track a bit to Tuesday night. One of the reasons I wanted to be home then was there was a benefit for Duane Pung from Freeport. We know Duane and his wife Kathy and their family. Duane was in a car accident on June 2 and has similar spinal cord to Mark's. Mark's injury is at C5-6 and Duane's is C6-7. That was the most wonderful, heart-warming experience I have had in some time. The number of people that supported them was amazing. They served a wonderful meal and had a silent auction with around 300 items on it. What an absolutely wonderful place we live. I don't think there is another place in the world where people care so much about God and one another. Christianity is alive and well and He must be pleased to see everyone helping our neighbor. And what a pleasure it is to do it for Him through Duane and his family. </div> <div> Once again thanks for all your prayers. God must be so pleased that Heaven is being stormed with prayers from all of you. Keep up the good work:-)</div> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, August 19, 2003 8:25 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> Time for an update,uh? The outing must have been good for him on Saturday. He slept pretty much the night through without any sleep aid medications! That was a first I think. Most of the time he either gets a sleeping pill or an anti-anxiety med or sometimes both. Course a trip to the mall makes most of us tired! Sunday morning he and I went to Mass in the chapel there at Abbot and then had lunch. After lunch, he was in need of a nap and I needed to fill out lots of papers/forms for the NTSB, FAA and insurance adjuster. Plus he had a ton of mail that Scott had brought us a few days before. We went down the hall to the Kenny Center which is a large area with a home-like atmosphere set-up that is used both for therapy and a nice environment for patients and families to use. So while he slept, I started on the task. We worked on those things for about 4 hours and got most of it done. That was a good feeling. He was too tired to go to Dee and Jeff's so they brought supper to us from a place called "Broders" (sp?). It was wonderful Italian food plus Dee had made some fresh peach crisp so that was quite a treat. Thanks again to their family. Jack of course (their 1 1/2 year old from Columbia) stole the show. He is soooo darn cute and has the best smile you have ever seen with a personality to match! What a package!</div> <div> Yesterday, Monday, was back to therapy. Steve and John, the wheelchair specialists, played around with the computer program on his chair and changed settings and some hardware, and with all of those things plus a bit more strength from 3 days ago, he was ABLE TO MOVE HIS CHAIR ON HIS OWN!!! YES!! He was very happy about that! Since I left Sister Kenny to come home, I called him last night and he was very happy to report to me that he had driven his chair by himself all the way back to his room from his last therapy:-) So at least he has had a taste of success and hopefully it will be enough drive to keep his spirits up and him working hard at therapy for a few days anyway. What a challenge this all is. Jill had been out east for a friend's wedding for the last 5 or 6 days and she came back yesterday, so I'm sure she will be able to visit him some evenings this week while I am home. She is so sweet:-) I think that is about all for now. Thanks so much for all your ongoing support. We appreciate it so much. Keep those prayers coming; miracles can happen. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, August 16, 2003 11:06 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello everyone,</div> <div> Yes, yes, I know and I am very sorry for not updating since Wed. night. Thursday night Earl and I went to a dinner and outing with Land O' Lakes and that was very enjoyable and we had a chance to see a lot of old friends and acquaintances. We spent the night at the Northland Inn so I did not have access to a computer. But anyway to try and backtrack a bit, Thurs. morn. we left immediately from Dee and Jeff's house and went to his house to take care of some things for him and Earl fixed his dryer. Then since Earl forgot his dress shoes, we picked up a new pair for him (he was in need anyway) and stopped back at Dee's to shower and get ready for his meeting and I went to Sr. Kenny. I stayed with Mark till about 3:30 and then went to the Northland Inn. That night he slept about 1/2 the night. He seemed to be getting a little more bummed out each day so I requested that he talk to someone and he got a motorized chair on Thursday. He is barely able to move it at all and that too, was very disappointing. </div> <bR> <div> Friday morning when I called him from the hotel, I could tell immediately that he was way down in the pits. And as the day wore on once I got there is was very obvious. He was giving up and had many discouraging comments to Earl and I. Earl came after his meetings were done and b/4 he left for home. He had a chance to meet with a psychologist and that was a good thing. But all in all, that was a very shitty (pardon my french but it was not a fun day at all) day. It was probably the most discouraging, depressing day if not ever, in a long time. He and I were on the computer after supper and I was trying my darndest to distract him when he kept complaining that his right shoulder was going numb and he was having less feeling than previously. So eventually someone from Abbot's neurosurgery dept. came and she checked him over, talked to him and had some encouraging things to say and he perked up a tiny bit. She felt the numbness may actually be a good sign since often when nerves start coming to life (even like when our arm "falls asleep" when we have laid on it) they will tingle, buzz or feel numb and it is similar in a case like this. So the numbness could indicate that the swelling is going down in his spinal cord for that quadrant of his body and with the therapy stimulatiing it, it could be coming to life more. So he felt once again that maybe there is a bit of hope and he shouldn't just "quit trying". That was a tough day.</div> <bR> <div> This morning i slept quite late again. When I got Sr. Kenny, Greg was there. He moved to Winona State today and stopped on his way. He is going to be a Resident assistant and his first meeting for that was at 3:00 today and will be very busy for the next 2 weeks so he wanted to visit Mark for a while. Mark had 4 therapy sessions today and then guess what??!!! Mark and I took a bus and went to the Mall of America for about 5 hours total inc. rides. We went to a movie--Sea Biscuit--it was very good and had a sundae b/4 and a smoothie after along with a little supper. He was not very hungry but was very tired so he was glad to be back in bed. He did enjoy the outing a lot though I think. It was his first time in 6 1/2 weeks to do anything of a social nature. We did not really do any shopping other than a dozen of Krisp Kreme donuts for the nurses and staff. They really treat him very well. Dee and Jeff really want him to come here to their house tommorow and have a cookout or something fun but he thought they might have to bring in some fun food and we would picnic out behind Abbott since he was so tired tonight. We finally decided to wait till morning afterhe'd slept to make the final decision. So thta is about all for now. I am really tired; it was kind of hard today but we relaxed at the movie too. So once again, thanks for your continuing prayers, cards, and thoughts and phone calls. Also, thank you very much to the Albany Mountain Toppers 4-H Club for the beautiful plant. He loves it:-) Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Wednesday, August 13, 2003 6:40 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello again!</div> <div> I am back here at Sister Kenny and Earl is here as well. That is a treat for me (& Mark, too). We went to the Courage Center today and Mark had quite an extensive interview. We were there for part of it and ate lunch during part of it. After that, we all went on a tour of the facility. It seems to be a very nice place and the results seem to be impressive. He will be accepted but at this point not till after his halo is off. The admissions counselor would not give us a clue as to whether they will change their "no halo" policy. So I guess we have to play their game and wait and see. The interview basically consisted of what Mark has for goals and how motivated they are to receive therapy and preparation for moving back to the "real world". Their rehab is a whole picture of not just physical and occupational therapy but learning how to ask for help, accept help, handle personal care attendants if they are needed, vocational training and getting back to the work force, getting back into a social life, etc. They try to cover it all. The rooms are all shared with another patient and they have room for 64 patients. They have many (I don't know a number) people that come daily for outpatient therapy. About 1/2 of their resident patient population are spinal cord injuries. At this particular date he is looking to be discharged from here around Sept. 4. If he starts with any new movement, then he could stay longer. Insurance benchmarks pretty much regulate the length of stay. The month in between until he would get his halo off (around the beginning of Oct.?) is what we are unsure of what the plan will be. This is pending on whether the courage Center will change their halo policy. </div> <div> Otherwise, he is doing well. He did not sleep last night but he and they felt he was maybe excited/worried about the visit today so I'm sure he'll sleep tonight. He and Earl are both sleeping right now. Greg and Ben are doing chores.</div> <div> As for more on who Mark is......He lives in Bloomington south of 494 in a home he bought 2 years (or is it 3?) ago. It is a rambler and he has done a lot of remodeling to it and some landscaping/yard work. He enjoys doing that kind of thing. He pulled up the carpets and found beautiful wood floors so he stripped and sanded and refinished those shortly after he moved in. Redid the basement bathroom and laundry room and put down ceramic tile there and last year in his kitchen as well. REdid the cupboards, etc. He is a do-it-yourselfer. He thinks a great shopping trip is to Menards or Home Depot. A gift card from one of those places is the "best" Christmas gift he could get:-( Of course one of his other hobbies is/was planes and flying. He started working on his pilots license about a year ago and had his first solo flight January 2. The rest is history. Well almost, we have 2 planes to sell now. He had just purchased another right b/4 this happened. He also was working on his Master's Degree in Business Administration. He plans to finish that when all his rehab is completed. He was about 1/2 through the program. And of course besides computers being his livelihood, they were a hobby too. He enjoys having the latest "stuff" on his computer and any of the latest and newest technology. He went to the technology convention in Las Vegas for work, but I think it should have been considered vacation. He is like a kid in a candy store when it comes to technology toys. I can only equate it to going to a quilt shop or fabric store. That certainly could never be considered work!!!! I think I better wake those guys up and take him outside for a while so he will sleep good tonight. Please continue to pray for movement and recovery and thanks so much for all you have done already. It helps soooo much. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, August 12, 2003 11:45 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Good evening,</div> <div> I have just spoken with Mark for quite a while and he was in good spirits. Jeff (uncle) had been there and stayed till about 10:00 and my sister, Eileen, was still there when we talked. He said that today and yesterday he had pretty good workouts and he had sore muscles so that's good!! In true German/Felling spirit, one must push oneself hard, right? He said they are also starting to work on a motorized wheel chair for him so he is hoping to get one of those in a few days. They are not sure if his arm will be strong enough to push the joystick but he wants it anyway to help build strength and endurance. Yeah, that's my Mark:-) Tuesday and Friday nights are his shower nights so if you are thinking of visiting on those nights, generally he said either earlier (b/4) 6:15-6:30 or after 7:30 or 8:00 is better. That way he can visit. Last night Jeff's parents were there and he said he felt really bad because he could only visit about 10 minutes and then they took him for his shower. On the other hand, if you want him smelling really good, you may want to go on Wed. or Sat.!!! His treach opening is down to about a pinhole my sister said. I guess he doesn't even have a bandaid on it anymore. All these little steps are such big ones. It is amazing how a person's perspective changes. </div> <div> A little more on who Mark is--after he graduated from college in '99, he worked for Caterpillar in Peoria, Illinois from May to Sept. or Oct. and then came back to MN and continued to work for them in the cities. In Peoria he was in some management type training program. He learned a lot but around the time he came to the cities, CAT experienced a drop in their stock and sales for construction equipment plummeted and he more and more felt like a glorified secretary. He was originally supposed to work in some of the Latin American countries but that was then put on hold. So he left that position around June 1 and traveled Europe for 4 or 5 weeks. Prior to leaving, he had been hired by Test Quest so when he returned from Europe, he started there and has been there ever since. There he has held various positions within the company and they have been very good to him since this has happened. Many of his co-workers have been there to visit him numerous times usually with cards and gifts in tow. Some of the postions had him traveling much of the U.S. and some international countries. He has been to Japan and Korea (twice or 3 times). Last summer he and Jill went to Russia for 6 weeks (that was for vacation and education, not work) and this last Feb. they went to Spain. We had an exchange student about 9 years ago and they were able to spend 4 or 5 days with him and his family and then did some other touring for a total of about 10 days. So you can see, he loves to travel and meet people. He has and still wants to go to third world countries and help the less fortunate. Just tonight I told him a story about another mom I had visited with whose son also had a halo at one time and she said they have it in his old room on a large teddy bear. He thought that was a good idea but he would like to send his to a Latin American country since they have a great need for them and other medical supplies. So naturally, that made me very proud once again. Tommorow I will get into where he lives and his hobbies--well, maybe NOT??? I am going back tommorow morning. I have been home 5 consecutive days!! I can't believe it, but I am very anxious to see him and the progress he has made. Plus, the guilt is haunting me--yes, I know that is not a good emotion but I'm working on letting it go:-) Tonight I even went to my quilt group meeting. What a great group you are! Pat was a superb hostess and we had a great time. Thanks a lot for lifting my spirits. I better sign off and sleep b/4 the drive down in the morning. We are going to the Courage Center and he will be interviewed and we will tour it. So I'll let you know how that goes too. </div> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, August 11, 2003 11:26 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> I want to update this quickly b/4 I turn in since I heard lots of comments today from so many of you faithful angels that check Mark's site on a daily basis so you too can know what is happening. I talked to him several times today since I am still at home in Albany. He had a good day, got a lot of ribbing from his day nurse, Sue. She is not only a great nurse (he's had lots of good ones!) but she has a great sense of humor too. She calls me "Mom" all the time and today she was wondering if I could do a little more shopping for Mark and get some more of the shorts I had brought in last week for him. She said he really likes the ones I bought and she would really like more only brighter colors and something with some flowers on!!!! Mark just groaned and then laughed but objected when I said I would do my best to find the brightest and "hottest" ones out there!!! She is always teasing him about something and so he just kicks her out of his room!! They get along really well. He said he had a good day of therapy even though Greg thinks his workouts are too "wousie" (sp?)!!! Most of the time Mark would agree with Greg but he said today a couple of the therapists worked him a little harder. He likes that better especially if he slept well the night b/4 which he did last night. I am so glad that the sleep problems seem to be getting better.</div> <div> On another note, there have been several people that have asked us over the last couple of days to tell a little more about Mark--what he did, etc. so I will try and put a few things in over the next few days. He graduated salutatorian in 1995 from Albany High School. He went on to North Dakota State University majoring in Electrical Engineering and graduated in 1999 with a degree in University Studies. He wrote his own degree basically because he took some business and international studies type classes along with the engineering classes. I am not sure if I am wording this correctly but I am sure he will set me straight if or when we check this over!! He went to Mexico his first time in high school and then spent 1 semester in college studying there and loves Mexico and the Latin American countries. While in Mexico, he lived with 5 or 6 young men that spoke only Spanish. As a result fromthat experience and many years of Spanish classes, he is very fluent in Spanish and 1 1/2 years ago started studying Russian so he and Jill could at least get around when they went there in the summer of 2002. Tommorow night I will try to go into what he did after college. But for now, all is well I guess. So I'll leave it all to Jesus for the night and will return tommorow with more info. Thanks so much for all the hugs, thoughts, cards and most of all, the prayers. Keep them coming, 'cuz he is on a roll:-) Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Sunday, August 10, 2003 8:00 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone,</div> <div> There is not a lot new with Mark since they do not do therapy on Sundays at all but Greg was there all day yesterday and today till 3 and Jim has been there too since about 1 and they have been doing therapy with him so he can gain some ground over the weekend. He seems to finally be in a better sleep pattern. Last night he slept till about 4 am and was awake till 6 and then slept again for a while so at least he hasn't had any all-nighters (awake) for a few nights now. Also the cultures they drew blood for last once again did not grow anything out which is good but I hope they give it up now and accept his temp is just going to go up for a few hours in the early am and drop off again and that is just the way it is!!! He was able to go to Mass this morning in the Chapel and was glad about that. And we were given lots of support and assurances of ongoing prayers when we went to church this am and I cannot begin to say how wonderful it feels to know you are all still praying for his recovery. If words could exhibit feelings, there would be bubbles and smiles and I am not sure what showing up here. You are the BEST!!! Thank God for angels because he has sure chosen a lot of you to help him out. There is NO doubt in my mind that all your prayers have and are making a marked difference in his recovery. I can really feel it if that makes any sense at all. All I can say is GOD IS GREAT!!!! I will keep you posted on progress as it happens even though it is a slow process, it is happening. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, August 9, 2003 11:40 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> Hey, I am still in Albany! I have slept 2 consecutive nights in my bed!! and I should make it 3 tonight. Greg left about 10:30 and he is spending the day with him today and might stay overnight. Then Earl & I or just one one of us will go tommorow am. The weekends get really long. I talked to Mark earlier and he had another OK night so I hope we have rounded the sleeping corner. Last night was the first evening/night that he was all alone with no company. When we talked to him, he was pretty down and bummed out but he said he is OK again this morning. Jill couldn't even make it because she had a wedding she had to attend. He is very understanding inknowing that everyone is so busy because he was the same just a little while ago. He also received some type of apparatus yesterday that will help support his arm(s) (they will switch it from side to side) while he is in his wheelchair. The purpose of it is to help strengthen his arms and hopefully enable him to feed himself and use a joystick type thing on a motorized wheelchair sooner than if he did not get the support thing-a-ma-jig! He requested that himself so that is very good. He has taken charge more in those respects since they got him off the one medication that changed his personality somewhat. He is still very happy about having the treach removed completely. That also ended having to have the treah dome on overnight that gave him humidity to breath in. Also he will have a lot less phlem (sp?) now because our body sees a treach as a foreign object in our throat consequently producing more flem (?). That is about all for now I think. Thanks again for everything. Also, thanks to Cyril and Debbie for the flowers & balloon and the St. Anthony Community Club for the beautiful plant and balloon. It sure sparks his room up. We have most of the cards up that he has received to date but still have a few more to go through and reread b/4 we hang them on the wall. Those that came early on, he doesn't remember so we have just decided to enjoy them all a 2nd, 3rd, or 4th time. We/he really appreciate everything. Keep those prayers humming! Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, August 8, 2003 6:25 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone, </div> <div> I am really getting lax. I know many of you check this daily looking for a new update and I really am sorry that I have missed some days again. Actually I had started this am and got interrupted so I quit and am starting over. I am home in Albany again. Priya and I came home last night around 10:00. She had gone to the Dells with Dee, Jeff and their family for a few days and yesterday she spent the day with Mark and I at Sr. Kenny. Mark liked that too and she got to do his computer work with him last night instead of me:-) I like that! Medically he is definitely making progress. I called him around noon and he said "guess what, Mom! they took my treach out this morning!!" Earlier this week they said it would be down-sized once more b/4 it would be removed and here it happened today already. He is very happy about that. It will close on its own and be mostly closed within a week or so they told him. Talking will be a little more labor intensive for a few days until that closes but pretty minor in the big picture of things. </div> <div> He has been more alert and interested in taking charge of his own care (which they want) and we are seeing more of his personality coming back or out. I think one of the drugs he was on was pretty wicked. On Tuesday night he did not sleep at all and I guess that was because it was the first day/night off that particular drug and they expected that could happen. Wednesday night he slept from about 3 am to 7 am and he told me today that last night was better still so I hope this pattern continues. I was told that not sleeping well is very normal or typical after this type of injury. So I hope this pattern changes soon so he gets more and better/deeper sleep. He feels much better, as we all do, when he sleeps well. </div> <div> His day nurse this week, Sue, has nicknamed him "The Urine King"!!! Yes, you guessed it! It is because his output is very high. Often times they need to encourage or push patients to drink more so they do not get dehydrated but not with him. They wish he would drink less! I guess lots of the patients develop nicknames of similar fashion! Humor is good for all. </div> <div> He continues to build strength and endurance in therapy. It is a very slow process but there are small changes so that is always exciting for me. He is not quite so patient. We have heard a number of times that "patients need patience" and that is so true. Some days we all do better than others and that is true for him also. </div> <div> I think that is about all for now. I will go back tommorow or Sunday and then I will take it a day at a time again as to when I will come back to Albany. Next Wed. I want to be there for sure as he will go to tour the Courage Center and family is invited as well as encouraged to go along. It will be his first "outing" in a wheel chair. Eventually as he has more therapy under his belt, he can leave on Sundays and maybe even overnight if it works. So we are hoping to take him to Dee and Jeff's on a Sunday real soon and maybe have a cookout or something fun. Oops, there I am again, planning too far ahead. One day at a time!!!!! Thanks again for all your support in all the various ways. </div> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, August 5, 2003 10:03 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone;</div> <div> Yes, I know, I did not update last night. I am sorry about that. Mark is doing OK. Yesterday he actually had a better day than today. Today he was really tired but yesterday he was actually quite fiesty and getting just a little upset with me if I didn't do things quite as he was thinking I should so I took that to be a good sign! Therapy continues daily with about 6 to 8 sessions of various types. Today he has less because we had his main family care conference telling us what they have found out so far and the plans for the near future. I guess for me there were no surprises or nothing that I have not heard over the last week or weeks. They are thinking at this point he will be here till about the first week of Sept. but it is subject to change. He was taken off all antibiotics tonight and that will remain unless he spikes a temp. He was also taken off another med that was started over at HCMC which they think was making him so thirsty. He was drinking around 4 qts or more of liquid every day and they wouild like to see that down some. He also got a different treach today--"the Jackson" which is stainless steel and it is plugged semi-permanently. That allows hiim to breath like you and I do now. In a week or so they will downsize it once more and if he does well with all of this, they will remove it completely even b/4 the halo comes off. So there are some positve things happening. Well, I better sign off even though I could write more but someone is waiting to use the computer here too. I am at Sr. Kenny and not at Dee and Jeff's yet. So till later or tommorow, continue praying for him so he thinks positive and that he will move lots and God willing, WALK again!!!! Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Sunday, August 3, 2003 8:00 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Good evening to all,</div> <div> We have heard that Sundays are slow days and a day off from therapy around here and that is true. So Mark had an easy day which is not his style and he would much rather continue therapy to move ahead but in reality, I think it was good for him. Unfortunately he slept very little last night but did sleep from about 9:30 to 12:30 today. Earl, Ben and Grandma came down to see him and Ed & Sandy from work and Jill were here much of the day. My norm is to come early and stay late. There have been a few days in my life when I wondered why God ever chose me to be a mother and lately I am so very grateful that he did. The rewards have been great and many. They more than make up for all the tears I have dropped in the last month. </div> <div> Health-wise he does great by day with breathing and his stats etc. and then about this time of night when he lays back, the coughing starts with lots of phlem and junk and then his stats usually drop too. So last night they switched antibiotics and have been using Albuterol (sp?) in a nebulizer because they think he still has something in the lower lungs possibly. The vest from the halo is so tight that it does not allow for good lung expansion when breathing so that contributes to the problem. Right now he is in the shower so he should smell better soon:-) I am hoping he will sleep really well tonight once and be fully rested for therapy tommorow. People that don't see him on a daily basis like I do, notice a big difference in him from visit to visit so that is great.</div> <div> On another note, I have failed to put an address on here for Sister Kenny. The address is 800 East 28th Street in South Minneapolis. You could plug this address into www.mapquest.com or check out the website at www.sisterkennyinstitute.com for directions or.........well I was going to copy them right out of my brochure to here but I can't find it right now so it must be in my van. I will try really hard to remember to put them on here tommorow. If you are familiar with Abbot Northwest Hospital, it is attached right to it. Or right on Chicago and 27th and 28th. So hopefully that will help for the moment. I apologize I can't help more at the moment. I will sign off for tonight. Thanks for everything once again. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, August 2, 2003 6:33 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone!</div> <div> Hey, Mark is sitting by me and he is going to dictate this update!!! </div> <div> Hello everyone! Thank you for all your support. I can't begin to say how much it is appreciated. I am now at Sister Kenny in rehab. It is just taking way too long. I can move some of the muscles in my arms but am not strong enough yet to do anything. Hopefully in a few weeks, my arm muscles will be strong enough so I can have a powered wheel chair so I can get around by myself and be able to feed myself. Since my spinal cord was pinched/bruised and not severed I am hoping, after talking to a number of people, that after a number of months as my spinal cord has a chance to heal I will get control of my legs and fingers back. But for now I have to work with what I have. </div> <bR> <div> Thank you again for all your prayers and support. It means sooo very much. Mark</div> <bR> <div> So a footnote from mom--he had a good day. He had his lunch outside and an easier day from therapy which he isn't necessarily happy about! He likes good, hard workouts. Also he would like you to check out his website and photos on it . It is www.markfelling.com </div> <div> Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, August 1, 2003 7:27 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Wow! two updates in one day. Well, I am feeling guilty so I am trying to make up for missing:-) I talked to Mark around 6:00 and he had a pretty good day. He said he wasn't quite as tired as the previous 2 days so that would tell me he is getting a bit stronger so that is good. He had just finished his supper and chose to eat it in the dining with a few of the other patients so that, too, I think is a positive move so he can meet others. He was inspired by an elderly volunteer gentleman today who took him to therapy. This man had a spinal cord injury sometime in the past and was at either a 2-3 level or 3-4 level (vertebrate) and was told he would never walk or use fingers, etc. and is doiing fine so he told Mark to never give up and not to believe the Drs. when they say "it can't happen" so I am glad he hears these encouraging stories. Hope and determination is where it is at. </div> <div> I don't know if I mentioned the other day (I could look back I guess) that he had his first shower in month the night he arrived at Sister Kenny but that was great and tonight he is scheduled for a 2nd one. The patients get one twice a week and they vary the nights. It is quite an ordeal esp. if they have a halo. They stuff lots of garbage bags into and around the vest to keep it dry but it feels wonderful! Now that is something I can understand! </div> <div> Unfortunately, he did not sleep well last night because his fever went up again so they did a check x-ray and that came out ok so they just pestered him a few times too many for good sleep he said. But his temp is fine again today so it is probably just that he cannot regulate it due to the injury. That is about it again for now so if you have not checked in for a few days, you may want to check the "past journal entries" section to get the one I wrote today. Thanks again for everything. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, August 1, 2003 10:28 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> First of all, I want to apologize for not getting an update on here Wed. night or yesterday. I guess I am getting lazy, lax or something! He seems to be settling in at Sister Kenny. He wishes things could/would go faster. It is a very slow process to get the muscles moving again that haven't moved in a month or moved minimally anyway. But on Wed. he had 5 or so therapy sessions which mainly were stretching sessions. Our muscles tend to shorten when they are not used. Yesterday I believe he had at least 7 or 8 different sessions. The first occupational (OT) and physical therapy (PT)sessions in the morning he has had in his room and that is only stretching to get him ready for the day's work. The rest are down in "the gym" for the most part. OT will work with him at mealtimes either in his room or in the dining room in time to come I guess. Yesterday he also had his first "technology" session with an OT. She did some bio-feedback with him. She put little sensors on the muscle and as he attempted to move that muscle, it moved the cursor on the screen. He thought that was the best session he'd had so far. Probably because he was in front of a computer(!) but also I think he could visually see something happen. So he worked on playing a game for a bit and the OT would click the mouse as needed. He gets EXTREMELY tired at this point. By 2:00 or so his eyes are about 1/2 open but the good side of that is he has been sleeping pretty good at night. I have not talked to him yet today but I will try over lunchtime. </div> <div> I am back home in Albany again. I came home about 9:30 last night and plan to go back tommorow (Sat.) Tuesday there will be a meeting for all our family, including him, to go over and hear the "game plan" so to speak. There will be a representative there from OT, PT, TR (recreational therapy), Dr. Thompson (his Dr. while he is there), social worker (Jim Hanson), primary care nurse and whoever else. All these people will present what they have determined after evalutating him for a week and give an estimated plan of therapy and length of stay at that facility. Depending on what we learn at that meeting, I am hoping to be able to come home to Albany a little more often, but we'll see I guess. I would definitely have to say the move has been positive so far. There is a definite change in atmosphere from the "you are a sick person, therefore we will take care of your health" at HCMC to more of a "you are OK now, so lets get moving on getting you back to society and we are not too concerned about how much oxygen is in your blood and what your temperature is" at Sister Kenny. They do monitor those things but not nearly so close. He looks great, his color is good and he is eatiing well and can now eat anything. He has had his speaking valve on his treach all day long. It has to come off for sleeping I think. </div> <div> On another note, for the most part, the best times for visiting him Monday-Friday is after about 5:30 or 6:00 in theevening. During the day they are quite busy with therapy sessions. If need be, you could call to Station 23 and ask what times he would not be in therapy on a given day (they get the next day's schedule the night b/4) and visiting would be possible during that time. Saturdays they have 1/2 as much therapy as during the week and none at all on Sundays. He definitely is looking forward to seeing many or all of you sometime. Ideally if visitors are split up over different evenings, etc would be great but he/we understand that isn't how life works. But he does enjoy visitors. When they are not busy, time get long especially as they build up strength and tolerance. </div> <div> I think that about covers things for now. I will try not to be so remiss about updating. Many, many thanks for your continued support and prayers. We just cannot begin to express fully how much it means and how it helps. I am working on getting all his cards up again in his room, and he was overwhelmed when he saw the stack to put up and even more so when I told him all those people are praying for his recovery. It really, really helps. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Wednesday, July 30, 2003 10:45 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning! Actually it is closer to noon I guess but anyway I did not update last night because I was soooo exhausted and very down in the dumps:-( I feel better this am but Mark was having a very difficult time emotionally last night and I stayed with him till about 10:30. That in itself was very draining but the whole day in general was draining. The very, very GOOD NEWS for the day was that he transferred to Sister Kenny Institute!!!!! That went fairly smooth. He did have a fever of 101.4 around 5:00 in the morning and we immediately got him out of bed into his chair and by 6:00 it was down to 98. He was on an air bed there that was filled with warm air and I think that may have been at least part of the problem. I guess we'll know for sure if in the coming days his temp. remains low. But there were no infections since all cultures and tests kept coming back negative. </div> <div> He has a private room which may or may not be a good thing. Sometimes it would be good to have a roommate to visit with but they are usually out of their rooms during the day anyway so it is what is I guess. He is in "Station 23" in room # 2339 and the phone # to his room directly is 612-863-2230. He has a speaker phone that answers after one or two rings and then he can talk if he is there. Be prepared for some background noise if you should call and to speak fairly loud. I don't have an address or directions right in front of me, but it is connected to Abbot Hospital and you can also check it out on the web by going to www.sisterkennyinstitute.com and it will give you directions there. That is about all for now. I better get going and get there. I slept till 10:15 or 10:30 this morning!! I haven't done that in forever. Love, Darlene </div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, July 28, 2003 8:45 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Good evening,</div> <div> I am sorry there wasn't an update last night. Earl, Priya, Grandpa Felling &Jeanette, and myself came down yesterday and took him outside for a while in the afternoon. Then they left and went home with Greg's car and I stayed down and slept at the hospital. Thus the lack of an update. I thought maybe if I stayed he would not get a fever like when Greg stayed Sat. night. Not so with me. I guess Greg had a magic touch:-) His fever went up to 101.4 this am and then back down to 100 by 10:00!! It is the craziest thing. So he was all set to go to Sr. Kenny rehab center at 12:45 and here they call to HCMC and said they had 4 nurses for the evening shift call in sick:_((((( Can you believe it?? So now we are supposedly on for tommorow am (Tues) at 10:00. It is supposed to be a sure thing!!!!! Well......except for........if something should come up. Our luck, it sort of has. He vomited up what supper he had started to eat around 6:00 and has been real tired all day. So hopefully he will be fine in the morning. He so wants to get started. I hope he will feel the same when he does get started. I have heard they work the patients very hard. I best get going; I just came to Dee and Jeff's to shower and I am going back to sleep in his room again just for a little insurance. I will definitely let you know tommorow night whether he will finally be out of HCMC or not. Keep praying. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, July 26, 2003 10:01 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello,</div> <div> I was home today and the day sure went by quickly. Our neighbor's son got married today and it was a nice change of pace to go to that and see lots of our wonderful neighbors/friends and they lent enormous amounts of support. The reception was held at their farm and was spectacular. I wish all of you could have seen the beautiful flowers and just the whole atmosphere. It was cool. Then I was home for a bit and left to watch Ben in the Arts-In performance at the Stearns County fair. It is a very fun 4-H event and he loves performing and drama, etc. The 7:00 show was the only one that I was able to take in. He was fantastic and I'm really glad I had the chance to see him. Usually he shows dairy animals too, but that did not work out this year. </div> <div> We talked to Greg a number of times today and he did great with Mark. Unfortunately, he is not feeliing well himself tonight. He has a headache and a bit of a sore throat:-( I guess stress is taking it's toll on all of us and that darn cold room Mark is in doesn't help. (I have lost my voice!) But Mark's temp. was up to 102.8 again this am when Greg got there at about 7:30 and then down to around 100 again most of the day. Otherwise he slept really well last night--yeah--and had a very good appetite today, Greg said. So hopefully he will still go to Sister Kenny on Monday but I am trying to remain cautious about optimistic thinking! Other than that, there isn't much else that I am aware of. I will go back down tommorow with Earl and Priya and they will come home with Greg and I will stay. Thanks again so much for everything. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, July 25, 2003 11:10 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hi everyone! Guess what??? I am home in Albany!! I got home about 9 or 9:30. I am hoping to stay home until Sunday and then I will go back. Tonight Jeff stayed with him and my sister was there too for a while and then Jill is taking from 9 till ?? Thanks to all for your help. Greg is leaving here early tommorow morniing and will stay the day and Sat. night till we get there Sunday. Jim also plans to go Sat for a while. </div> <div> We had another bump in the road this am. He spiked a fever to 103 again for about 2-3 hours. So they drew blood, sputum, and urine for culturing and did another ultrasound on his gallbladder (which was fine) and the culture preliminaries will be back tommorow and the 48 hour grow-out time on Sunday. But they are not really expecting to find anything. They just can't figure out what is causing these periodic spikes. So possibly he may still go to Sister Kenny on Mon. but then we would be planning too far out so for now, we'll shoot for making through the night unevenfully. He got to go OUTSIDE tonight b/4 I left. He LOVED it. He loved the wind in his face and everything about it. Thank goodness Jeff was there because the chair he was in had a mind of its own and is difficult enough to push inside but outside where it is bumpy, etc. was much worse so we were/are very grateful once again for (Dee &) Jeff. His sensory feeling seems to be very slowly increasing so that is very exciting. I also polished his toenails purple!!! Someday payback might not be as much fun but we sure had fun with it today. Those little purple toes generated a lot of fun conversation and he is a great sport about it. That is about it I think so I will sign off with a good night and many thanks for everything once again. I really appreciate the visitors we have had this week as it seems time is getting a bit longer each day. So off to my own bed........Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, July 25, 2003 8:55 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,</div> <div> I didn't get to updating last night so I thought b/4 I leave this am for the hospital. He finally had a good night's sleep on Wednesday night. That "BiPap" machine did its thing and he looked so good yesterday am when I got there and he felt really good too. So since he felt so well, he wanted to leave for Sr. Kenny at once! Once again, barring any new infections or gliches, he should go on Monday but I have learned not to count on anything more than a few hours in advance so we'll see come Mon. He is definitely feeling better because he is getting extremely bored! Ya know those Fellings!!! We must not relax too much or be idle for long! Time's a wastin'!!!! There were also a couple of very optimistic moments. Occupational therapy came and tested the muscles in his arms and some/a few/a alot??? (I don't know how many because all these names of muscles don't mean much to me besides biceps and triceps) had twiches or slight movement which she said is very good because that is what they will build on and strengthen. Those where she felt nothing could remain that way or still come back once the "pinal cord shock" has healed which is anywhere from 6-8-10 weeks I guess. But there too, every person, Dr. or nurse has a differing opinion. Seldom is a procedure done or opinion given the same. My plan for today is to get to his house again sometime and pick up what he will need for Sr. Kenny and purchase what he doesn't have. He needs easy to dress, elastic waist shorts and sweats and extra generous t-shirts that will go over his halo along with shoes and personal care items, etc. Also I am hoping to go home tonight or early tommorow am and Greg will come down and stay with him. Some other wonderful people will fill in the gaps till I get back on Sunday so I am looking forward to that. Better go or he will NOT be happy with me!! He has been so-so sweet. He is very well liked by the staff and loves to speak Spanish with any of them that he thinks might!!! Thanks Tim, for delivering his laptop and your visits and to any and all involved in getting it back to Test Quest for the needed repairs and Brian (?) for doing them. Also, thanks Carrie B. for the beautiful flowers. I don't know where you are located at the moment so when I find that out, you will be thanked properly. That was so sweet of you. And of course, many, many thanks to all of you for everything you have done and continue to do for all of us. I can't begin to say how great it feels. Keep those prayers coming as he begins rehab. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Wednesday, July 23, 2003 11:06 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Oh my God!! I can't begin to tell you what an emotional day this has been. It started out totally depressing and got worse and Mark and I were crying and by 5:45 or 6:00 we were crying tears of joy! He had another bad night last night and slept lightly off and on till about 2:30 and anxiety totally overtook him. His respitory rate was between 40 and 50 and I even got very firm with him telling him to get a grip. When someone came in, he would slow down to the 20's or occasionally if he really concentrated. We tried every tactic imaginable. His nurse called the neurosurge team in and several other Drs. and who knows who. The head neurosurge Doc. told Mark that he needed to prepare himself psycologically to go back to ICU because he needed to be back on a ventilator. Well we both lost it and Mark said he would not go back. Thank God for the wonderful residents that are on right now because Dr. Matt saved the day again along with Trish and Kai. They suggested he be put on a "Bipap" machine first to see if that would help. It blows oxygenated air into the lungs and can be done out on the regular floor-basically filling the lungs' lower lobes to help loosen flem from pneumonia and giving him a break from working so hard at it. The head Dr. agreed to a 3 hr. trial and within about 2-3 minutes of being hooked up to it, Mark fell into a DEEP sleep which has not happeden for several days. He slept till about 5:30. Jill and her Mom and two of my cousins, Joyce and Joyce came down. Joyce and Joyce and I went across the st. to eat and when we came back his nurse, Sara, was so excited with good news. She showed us that he was reacting on his feet to pain and pressure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you believe it??? He also has markedly more feeling in his arms and moved BOTH of them. There is no doubt in our minds that it is the prayers that is doing it. God is working a miracle here. So I guess now He will continue to test our faith to see how far the successes will go. We are Catholic and there is a group of nuns call the "Poor Clares" that have chosen to devote their lives to prayer. A number of people have written to them or gone to see them to ask them to pray for Mark and his recovery. They sent "Ephipany Holy Water" with one of my cousins and said we should massage his arms with it which we have done and will continue to do. Also one of my cousins had a dream where our Grandma dressed in a very distinctive orange suit dress told her we should massage his arms and hands with Holy Water!!! Miracles do happen. So it has been quite a day! His temp. has been flucutating(sp?) so it is questionable whether he will go to Sister Kenny Rehab Center tommorow yet or if he will have to wait till Monday. I guess we'll see what God has planned. It is in His hands. Thanks for all your support, love, prayers, cards, help, food, flowers,gifts, etc. You are the best. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Tuesday, July 22, 2003 10:15 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello; No update last night due to Mom staying overnight in his room at the hospital. Both Sun. am and Mon. am he must have had panic attacks or whatever caused his oxygen saturation level in his blood to drop. So they would tell him it was not safe to eat or drink and pull everything from him causing him to be even more anxious. Once I would get there, we wouuld get things straightened out and he would get food and drink back. He is still mostly interested in drinking-lots of milk and water. So he begged me to stay with him last night and I did. It was a very (or should I say short!) night for both of us. I slept a couple of hours and then was up with him for a couple and so on. About 7 this am, I gave up and could not stand anymore. Later this afternoon I came back to Dee and Jeffs and slept for a couple of hours and went back tonight. He wanted me tonight too, but I decided I just couldn't. The guilt is eating me up but....on the other side-the main side-he is doing OK other than the sleeping disorders. His temp. has stayed down today and part of yesterday. Nothing grew of the cultures so he is again off the antibiotics. He was weaned off the morphine pump over Sunday evening and finished at 8:00 Mon. am. He got a smaller (size 6) treach Monday am so is very easy to understand now and his voice sounds like him. The pneumonia is definitely MUCH better and most of yesterday and all of today he was completely on his own with no oxygen at all. Jeff stayed a bit longer than I tonight and he said they put Oxygen back on for thenight to help him rest easier (we hope!) As for Sister Kenny and rehab?? We are hoping he will go yet this week but if it gets to Friday, he wont because they don't usually start new patients on weekends. He really wants to get on with it and I can tell he is losing muscle and getting flabby in his arms. It is time to go! The next thing is that Earl, Jim, Ben, Priya and Scott got Mark's plane out from the crash site yesterday so that is done and now the NTSB can continue their duties. Following that, they stopped by the hospital for a short visit b/4 chores and Greg got there at the same time from work so it was the first time we were all together in quite a while. It really was nice and felt very good. Some went home, some stayed and Jim went to the Twins game and came back again after the game. So please continue to pray for his recovery and rehab soon and so God will hold him close and release him from his fears. Congratulations to Ronnie and LuAnn on the birth of their grandtwins!!! How wonderful. Love, Darlene </div> <bR> <div> <B>Sunday, July 20, 2003 10:55 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Hello everyone,</div> <div> Sorry I did not get to update last night. It was just too late and Earl was down with our neighbor, Sharon, and our girls to visit as well as check out the crash site. He wants to get the plane out tommorow. So it got quite late till they left for home. Anyway, Mark did fine yesterday. He was very tired and so slept a lot but they told us that is very common coming out of ICU because sleep is hard to come by there. So I anticipated today to be much the same. Unfortunately it was not. When I called down this am, he was back up to a fever of 103.7 :-( So we waited all day (till 7:30 tonight) to see a Dr. to determine whether he would go back on antibiotics which of course is what is happening. He should also be getting another unit of blood since his hemoglobin is low again. It is so frustrating. Plus the blood was ordered around noon or 1:00 and it is just wait, wait, wait some more. Consequently, this will probably delay his move to rehab but.......then again we never know for sure. Maybe we will find out tommorow if the fever is caused by his lungs again or she said it could be a fungus from all the medications he has been on!!! Usually though cultures take 48 to 72 hrs. so maybe Tues?? I just want to say, wake me up when it is over. Oh my, I am soo tired again. I just don't seem to get caught up and when I left at 10 tonight, he asked what time I will be back!!! He is so sweet and loving. He has been wonderful to me and talk to. Better go. Love, Darlene Thanks for the prayers, cards, visits, food sent to our house in Albany and anything I may be missing. I have to publicly thank my sister, her husband and family--Dee, Jeff, Em & Jack. They have been great and sharing the Hotel d'lonn with me!! </div> <bR> <div> <B>Friday, July 18, 2003 10:50 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Good evening! Mark took a big step today. He stayed off the ventilator last night and that is the major of several criteria for leaving ICU or being off 24 consecutive hours. All of his stats were good and the pneumomia is good so he left 16 days of Intensive Care behind about 3:00 and moved to intermediate care down the hall to station 22E. He has a very nice, large, single room with one whole wall of windows. The first time he has seen daylight directly since July 2. He didn't enjoy it as much as he probably would have in a normal state of mind since he did not sleep last night. About 11:00 they gave him Benydryl to help him sleep well and it had the opposite effect on him and completely wired him up and he was miserable. Consequently, he was very tired and drowsy today but so over stimulated that he couldn't relax and sleep this morning either. The hosp. called me at 6:25 so I showered quickly and went ASAP. Needless to say, I am dragging tonight. He finally relaxed in his new room and slept about 1 1/2 hours from 4 to 5:30 so that helped. I hope he sleeps well tonight. He could go to Sister Kenny as soon as Mon or Tues. unless he would start with a new infection or pneumonia. His temp is also finally down in the normal range and hemoglobin was up. He had received 2 units of blood again on Wednesday. So that is about it for today. I'll sign off before I am sleeping at the computer. I'm sure we'll see some of you this weekend. Thanks for all the prayers, love and support. It is appreciated so very much. Also thanks for understanding my lack of phone calls. It is difficult to call as often as we'd like. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Thursday, July 17, 2003 10:00 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Another day is history. We have lived through the first 2 weeks and all is well. Today was certainly a plus day for Mark. He had a swallowing test today where they put a camera down to his throat to watch if he could swallow food and liquids correctly without going into his lungs or treachea. He passed with flying colors and doesn't even need thickened liquids:-) He was/is absolutely thrilled. I think he drank (ihad to keep track) about 72 ounces of water, 12 ounces of milk and some jello, ice cream shake-like thing, and a little real food for supper. By far his favorite was water. So this is a huge step. One of the nurses said rarely does anyone go directly to thin liquids-usually thickened ones come first. He was on the repirator overnight last night but off all day today with his numbers a lot better (respirations per min. and the percentage of oxy. in his blood) and they thought they would try it tonight without so I will call and check again b/4 I turn in here in a few minutes to see for sure. On the down side, he still has a temp of about 102. The spinal fluid so far shows no bacteria but the complete culture will be back tommorow or Sat. He has a huge fear of me leaving and being left alone as he is unable to call for a nurse or help. So I hope to be back there early tommorow am and I am sure that will get better in a few day. I am thinking (only a guess) that he may leave ICU tommorow or Sat. I will let you know. If that is the case, he will just be down the hall a bit in Station 22. For some reason he seemed to be goofy or halucinating today from the morphine I was told. He was dreaming of computers and all sorts of things as he snoozed off and on. Oh yes, he also had the speaking valve in most of the day. It was GREAT--mostly for my sake. So anyway if you are thinking of visiting him, the best time for now seems to be mornings or earlier afternoons. He is quite tired by the evening and is not as willing to talk. Thanks again for the notes on here and in U.S. snail mail. He loves them all. Also for your continuing prayers. It helps soooo much. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Thursday, July 17, 2003 9:53 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Good morning,\</div> <div> Well it just happened to me again. Had a long update done and it is not showing up!! I hate that. Anyway, sorry I did not get the update done last night. It was the most exhausted I have been (physically & emotionally) since the 36 hr. day when this started. It was kind of a holding day for him. he was in the chair from about 10 to 4 and of the vent again so that was good. But his temp. was back up ranging from 101 to 102.8 so they decided they should do a spinal fluid tap. As he is more alert and awake (off all meds except morphine for pain, antibiotics, and blood thinners to avoid clots) he is also scared. This is an unusual emotion for Mark but so is being paralyzed. So he really wants me with him a lot. He requested that I be there for the procedure which was done right in his ICU room. What should have been a 10 to 20 minutes procedure ended up being 2 hours:-( It reminded me again of how helpless he is at the moment. I have been trying not to focus on what won't be or what was but concentrating on the now so it was very draining for me. The first Dr. couldn't get fluid so they quit for about 15 min. and brought in recruits and started over. Finally after 2 hrs. mission accomplished. I had Jesus, Mary, Joseph and every angel, saint and anybody that was available helping those Doctors. They came through and so did you. That was one time I drew on all your prayers. Thanks so very much. I had planned to go home to Albany but once again scrapped those plans. Earl didn't want me driving so I stayed at Dee and Jeff's. They have been wonderful and have so many others. Yesterday 4 ladies from Test Quest came to visit brought many CDs, movies, and books on tape from all his co-workers. He was so pleased and on his behalf, I want to thank all of you. You made his day. He enjoyed one of the cds for a while. That is about all for now. I was on my way to the hospital b/4 and now I hope this goes through this time so I can get there. He probably feels abandoned!! LOve, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Wednesday, July 16, 2003 0:51 AM CDT </B></div> <div> We had another good day. His temp. was up a bit but only to 101.5. But he was off the ventilator/respirator all day from early am till about 9:00 p.m. He ABSOLUTELY did NOT want to be put back on but he was so exhausted we finally got through to him it was not a set back but insurance that he would not go backwards but allow him a good night of rest to have another marathon day tommorow. But for Mark, tommorow is not soon enough. He also had th speaking valve put on his treach several times and soon it can stay on or the entire treach will be replaced to something a little smaller and is then capped all the time to allow speaking or his air to pass over his voice box creating sound!!! He is very anxious to "get on with whatever needs to be done" so he will get better!!! His determination is great and he was such a trooper today. I am so proud of him:-) There was also a preliminary swallowing test done. It consisted of swallowing ice chips tainted with blue food coloring and then suctioning of his treacha to see if any went in there instead of his esophogus (sp?) and it did not. They may do another swallowing test with a micro-tiny camera tommorow or Thurs. b/4 they allow him to eat. He wants to eat NOW and ANYTHING!!! All this is to ensure that nothing will get sucked into his lungs creating further pneumonia-type problems. Grandpa and Grandma (my parents) came today with my sister. It was hard for them but I think they did OK and now know just how he is. That is about all for now. It is way too late but I really had totake care of several things. I had planned to go home tonight but he really wanted me to stay. It's been a while since I have felt so wanted (esp. by a 26 year old!!) He really is a cool guy. Thanks again for everything. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, July 14, 2003 9:15 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Wow! I think I'd have to say we had the most positive day since this nightmare started. He was quite awake this am b/4 I got there but was sleepy when I arrived about 11:30. So he had a little nap and at 1:30 he got a speaking valve put in for a little while. He loved that--had tons to say. He was wondering why the staff and Drs. don't inform their patients what is going on. He thought he'd been there 6 months and no one has told him anything!!!! So we cleared that up. And he was very hungry and wanting to eat anything. He didn't get his wish:-( That tired him out and slept most of the afternoon. Yes, his fever is finally down. Came down around noon and has stayed around 99-100.4 so hopefully the new antibiotic they started yesterday is doing its thing. The big event of the day was they took him off the respirator about 5:45 and he was still on his own when we left about 8:15. He will get a little support overnight from the respirator because it makes them really tired at first. So hopefully if all goes well, he will be off the vent all day tommorow and then we will go from there:-) Thanks again for all the prayers, cards, computer notes, thoughts, wishes and visits from all the cousins, aunts, uncles and some co-workers. Soon he will be ready for all visitors. Lots of love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Sunday, July 13, 2003 9:34 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Another day almost behind us. We are trying to take an hour at a time/a day at a time. Sometimes it gets us through, sometimes not. He is still battling the fever but it did stay at about 102 most of the day today. They draw blood and take sputum (sp?) nearly every day for culturing and the preliminary results from yesterday showed them today that he may have a blood infection of some type going so they changed antibiotics and tommorow the full culture will be back. The pneumonia is getting better each day. Most of the day he was pretty sleepy and I wanted to come home so we had said goodbye and as I was leaving, I looked back one more time and here his eyes were wide open so Earl and I went back and he was wide awake. He was not agitated or anything and we talked for at least 45 minutes till he was really tired. But he was much more at peace than he has been since the accident. He wants to know exactly what is happening and where he is at. He moved his right arm/wrist to a slight twist so we were excited to still see that. There is something there to build on. He also has feeling in his left arm but cannot twist it yet. I am going back tommorow and the plan tonight was that they will put the speaking valve on his treach so that will be exciting if it comes to pass. As soon as he is off the ventilator he can go outside for a bit. He can't wait:-)</div> <div> We have met many wonderful people through tragic experience going through similar traumas. God certainly works in ways we don't understand. Continued thanks for all your prayers and well wishes. I may have said it before, but I can't say it often enough how much it means to us. May God bless all of you. Good night. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, July 12, 2003 11:05 PM CDT </B></div> <div> Today was an OK day for Mark. He still was pretty sleepy and not talking like he had been Tues., Wed., and Thursday. We are thinking it must be the fever because he was off all the meds and even taken off morphine at 11:30 this a.m. in an effort to try to wake him. His temp. today ran around 102+ so a little better than Friday. Everything else looks good like blood pressure, etc. One of the Docs. turned his repirator down more and then someone else did the opposite so I am not sure where that is at tonight. But I just called in again and he seems like he calm and resting nicely according to his nurse. Once he is off the ventilator for 3 days he will leave the intensive care unit to an intermediate type room. I hope this will happen soon. We have been told it will be a very long, long slow process but I did not think it would be THIS slow. May God grant all of us patience:-) He did tell me again today to "take me home" and the words I love to hear most "I love you, Mom" so there are some definite bright spots. I better get some sleep because I will need to be ready when he gets his speaking valve--he won't quit!!! He had very little company today; just Jill, myself and a few of his co-workers stopped by for a bit so maybe the extra rest was good for him. Thanks again for all the prayers and messages. Love, Darlene</div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, July 12, 2003 9:58 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Darn it. I just entered a whole entry and somehow it didn't go where it was supposed to. As I had said earlier, yesterday was a set-back day. If not for Mark, it sure was for us. He had been very talkative for a couple of days mouthing words and yesterday he slept all day and I was told this a.m., all night too and is still sleepy now. He had a very high temp. yesterday ranging from 104 to 104.8. He was also very agitated in the am so they gave him something to help him rest. We were told the pneumonia had not been getting worse so I hope that trend continues when I hear what this morning's chest X-ray comes back. He could be so sleepy from the sleep deprivation over the last week and also various medications can have that effect. Yesterday Earl, Dee(my sister) and Jeff(her husband/Mark's aunt & uncle) and their 2 young children, and myself toured Sister Kenny. The other day we toured Bethesda. Both seem real good but we are hoping he will be able to go to Sister Kenny for rehab. I'm sure God will do what He thinks is best for Mark. Thanks for all your prayers and thoughts. YOu are the best. I will try to update tonight. I was/am on my way to the hospital. I stayed down again last night. Now I will try to send this again. Thanks for all your messages too. I will print them again and take them up with me to read to him. He smiled yesterday when I told him about the site, messages, and cards he has received. It REALLY means a lot to all of us. </div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, July 12, 2003 9:58 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Darn it. I just entered a whole entry and somehow it didn't go where it was supposed to. As I had said earlier, yesterday was a set-back day. If not for Mark, it sure was for us. He had been very talkative for a couple of days mouthing words and yesterday he slept all day and I was told this a.m., all night too and is still sleepy now. He had a very high temp. yesterday ranging from 104 to 104.8. He was also very agitated in the am so they gave him something to help him rest. We were told the pneumonia had not been getting worse so I hope that trend continues when I hear what this morning's chest X-ray comes back. He could be so sleepy from the sleep deprivation over the last week and also various medications can have that effect. Yesterday Earl, Dee(my sister) and Jeff(her husband/Mark's aunt & uncle) and their 2 young children, and myself toured Sister Kenny. The other day we toured Bethesda. Both seem real good but we are hoping he will be able to go to Sister Kenny for rehab. I'm sure God will do what He thinks is best for Mark. Thanks for all your prayers and thoughts. YOu are the best. I will try to update tonight. I was/am on my way to the hospital. I stayed down again last night. Now I will try to send this again. </div> <bR> <div> <B>Saturday, July 12, 2003 9:42 AM CDT </B></div> <div> Yesterday was a "set-back" day. If not for Mark, it was for us. He had been very talkative with mouthing and they were telling us he would be off the vent soon but.......he spiked a fever all day being 104-104.8 most of the day. They cannot figure out what is causing it. He was very agitated in the a.m. so they gave him something to help him rest but due to the high fever, he slept all day and I was told this morning, all last night too. HIs pneumonia was not gettng worse. The results of this morning's X-rays are not back yet so hopefully that trend is continuing. But the good news is that his fever is down to 102 and has been for a # of hours. She told me on the phone this am that he still seems disoriented a bit but not to be concerned because it could be the extensive sleep deprivation over the last week and a combo of various medications. So I am on my way to the hospital now and will try to update tonight. Thanks for checking in and continued prayers. Earl, Dee (my sister), Jeff (her husband/Mark's aunt & uncle), their young children, and myself toured Sister Kenny yesterday. We had also toured Bethesda Rehab the other day. We are hoping to send him to Sister Kenny if possible. I'm sure God will do whatever He feels is best for him. Updates coming soon.</div> <bR> <div> <B>Thursday, July 10, 2003 9:58PM CDT </B></div> <div> This page has just been created. </div> <bR> <div> We are so pleased you are visiting Mark's website for the first time. There are sooo very many people that are praying, have called, sent letters and well wishes either directly to Mark or us, his family and we are hoping to be able to keep you posted as to what is happening with him. We will try to update this frequently. Please understand this is a long, challenging road for everyone. Mark is loved by many as has been apparent over the last week. We appreciate so very much everything that has been done for all of us so far that words really cannot express our feelings adequately. Please feel free to share Mark's address with whomever you think might enjoy it. We will print your emails out for Mark at this point and have him read them. For those who are not familiar with Mark, he has 3 brothers--Jim, Greg, Ben and 1 sister--Priya. Mark is oldest. My name is Darlene (Mom) and Earl (Dad). As for his condition report as of today: we continue to receive conflicting reports and stories of what is and what will be. The accident was about 9:50 p.m. last Wednesday. We received a call from HCMC about 11:50. Earl and I drove down in a storm. We were greeted with grim news. Paralized from the upper chest (nipple line they call it) down. He received a halo and had major reconstructive surgery on his neck most of the day on Thursday. His biggest struggle was with the ventilator pipe the next 3 days. Because of the 4th of July weekend, he could not get a treacheotomy (sp?) until Monday. That made him much more comfortable and we have been able to read his lips pretty well. His mind is fine and he is quite fiesty (very normal in other words!!) Right now our biggest challenge is pneumonia which is very common from lying still in bed. Consequently he is running a fever sometimes spiking to 104. He has been up in a chair about twice a day the last 3 days each time for about 3 hours. He likes that. We are hoping he will be off the ventilator in the next day or two. Then he will move out of ICU to a regular room. Can't wait. From there he will go to a rehabilitation facility such as Sister Kinney or Bethesda Rehab Hospital in St. Paul. He does have sensory feeling in his arms but not his hands. He is able to move his shoulders. So that is pretty much where we are at in a nutshell. We do not have a need to go to Valleyfair this summer because we are on a constant roller coaster ride it seems. With much love and thanks for all your prayers. Darlene and family </div> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>